What can i do before she dies?

Question

one of my old friends has anorexia. She's had it since about, december, and it's just getting worse. She hasn't had her period since march and she's become a shell of her former self :(

I'm really worried about her, and, what makes it worse is that she has nobody but me. She has lost contact with all her other friends and her mother and father just couldn't care less. They've handled it extremely badly, refusing to accept she has anything wrong with her and her dad once threw her food in her face and called her 'pathetic for not being the daughter he wanted' when she refused to touch her dinner (i was in her room when it happened). Her mum is in denial, and has infact lost a lot of weight herself, which i think is the wring message to put accross.

she refuses to see any psychologists/councellors as much as i beg her to, she was referred to one but hated the way she was treated and never went back.

basically, what i'm trying to ask is what can i do to help her? I've even enrolled in a councelling course at college and ordered copious amounts of ED books from the internet. I'm determined to make her better, i don't want to see her die. And i'm afraid she will die before she gains the confidence and courage to seek help from a professional.

what can i do? please help me.

x*x

Answer 1

If I were in your position, I would make her realize how serious her problem was and that she could die/get seriously sick(er?) if her eating disorder continues. Sometimes scaring people into stopping things works. I would make her read the ED books with me, and slowly get her to eat more.

i would also be sure not to nag her so much that she gets fed up with me and won't talk to me anymore. If this happens, who else will help her?

dont let her end up like this: http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=h...

Answer 2

Try talking to her. If that doesn't work, all you can do is try. Like that guy said b4, she has to want to help herself. If she can't, then she hasn't the strength enough to do anything but wait...

Answer 3

The main thing is to just be there for her. Let her know that you are trying really hard to understand and want her to get better. The misconception about anorexia is everyone thinks it's always related to just feeling overweight. The truth is that it's a psychological disorder. By not eating, she could feel like she is defying a natural life need and controlling at least some sorta aspect in her life. When people are depressed or something goes wrong, people start to feel like they're losing control. She needs to feel in control again. Help her find a way to regain that in her life.

If this isn't the problem or it's passed the point of self-help and recovery, you just may have to take action yourself by reporting this to the appropriate authorities. The problem with this is that she may end up hating you for it; that she will feel betrayed. This is why you need to be understanding and strong. Stick with her through the recovery process no matter what. When she gets better, she will see how determined you are to keep her safe, even if it's from herself.

Answer 4

I'm afraid you're going to have to force her if you want her to get better. Contact the local authorities and tell them your friend is dying of an eating disorder and her parents aren't doing anything about it. If she's as bad as she sounds she'll probably be rushed to the ER, be put on a feeding tube, and after she gains a little more wait be sent into treatment. Trust me her life is on the line and you NEED to do this!

Answer 5

make the last hours of her life the best you can.

Answer 6

I don't think there is really anything more you can do besides pray for her.  She has to want to help herself and it doesn't seem that she is able to do that right now.

Answer 7

ask her if she would like to talk to someone with her same issues..i am willing..but your friend really needs help..and just from experince the only thing that save me was going into the hospital for 4weeks..tell her that she needs to give it another try not all of them are good...the one i have truely cares and gave me her cell phone,e-mail and even uses her lunch hour to see me,..tell her in recovery they don't make you gain hugh amounts of weight..and they really montior you so you don't get fat..also you meet with a dietian which helps to know how many calories you need..a calorie is a calorie meaning that you only gain weight if you go over your calorie intake by a ton..like 3500calories= 1 pound..and they don't make you quite exercise just a normal amount..the reason people gain weight who eat at fast food is that ..most of that food is high in fat[higher in fat=higher calorie] 9calories per gram of fat,4calories per gram of protein, 4 calories per gram of carbs..so they are eating smaller proteins with higher fat so they eat more meaning they go over their calorie needs..tell her that she will never be happy unless she acceptes her self..maybe you could go with your friend to meet the cousoulor to be her support..just try your best and keep trying..i didn't get help tell i had lost so much..but tell her i love my life so much more

Answer 8

I think in this case you would call the police station, this is a life threatening situation and need to get attention. I think even 911 is appropriate in this case since she is about to die.

Good luck.