What can my manger really do to me if I can't make it?

Question

My general manager came up to me to yesterday to let me know about a trainers meeting. Well he was giving me heads up since I have kids and it's a day meeting and I work nights. Well my fiancee and I both work at the same place and both of us are trainers in different positions. Normal we have a babysitters but they go back to school and everyone else I know works days they aren't going to take off work so they can watch my kids. Well I have called everyone that I am close to just to make sure no one can. I even told my manger that it's going to be very hard since everyone I know works or goes back to school. Well he said can't you take them to a babysitter or to a daycare. I looked at him and said well my babysitters will be in school on that day and I can't just take my kids to a daycare for one day with out paying for a full -week. Well I have been thinking about looking for a at home babysitter for the day but It's so hard for me to leave my kids with someone I just don't know. I know there are a lot of parents that have to do that but I just can't not even for one day. So I need some advise here should I find a a babysitter for one day? Or should I just explain to him I don't have anyone whats so ever and get wrote up if he does write me up. On top of this I don't even want to be a trainer no longer you don't even get paied more. Oh this is bothering me it's the way he came up to me and told me I think you can find someone to watch your kids for the day don't you think you can drop them off at a day care. Oh the way he said it to me like my kids are nothing. My kids mean the world to me more then that **** *** job. someone please help.

Answer 1

It's sad that some bosses and workplaces are so inflexible that they can't even comprehend the needs of parents, much less provide any help.  If I understand this correctly, you are being asked to attend a meeting that is outside your normal work hours.  It's a one-time thing and not a usual expectation of your job, and you have child care during your regular work hours, so the boss really can't accuse you of slacking off because of your children. The company doesn't provide child care.  As I see it, these are your options:

1. You could just not attend the meeting and risk whatever consequences there are.  If they take any kind of action against you, you MIGHT have a case for claiming discrimination, because you have been treated differently from other employees based on your family status. But if your job description or contract specifically says that these meetings are part of the job, you don't have a case.

2. You could take whatever child care you can find; it's just a one-time thing, and chances are your children will be OK.  But talk to your boss about not ever having to do that again.

3. You can tell your boss you no longer want to be a trainer, ask to be reassigned, and then you won't have to attend the meeting.

4. You can quit.

This is yet another example of the wonderful "family friendly workplaces" we have in this country. Good luck.  

Answer 2

Well, since you don't want to be a trainer, then tell him that. If you're not a trainer then you don't have to be at the meeting.

Or-- since your husband will be there, maybe you can talk to your boss about just letting him fill you in on what happened.

If you personally feel that you should go to the meeting, then I don't think it would be too aweful to get a 1-time sitter. Ask around, and you can get someone who has references to make sure they are good quality.