What causes low self esteem or insecurity problems? how do you overcome them?

Question

What causes low self esteem or insecurity problems? how do you overcome them?

Answer 1

you dwell on the negative or what you think is negative about you instead of just accepting what you have and be fine with it...

Answer 2

There are a lot of reasons for low self esteem,  for instance being picked on can cause low self esteem . The best way to overcome them is to start liking youself , its not going to happen over night but I have a couple things that I do. I write down at least ten good things about myself that makes me feel better or treat yourself to something. There really isn't no magic pill out there to make it go away you have to do it on your own .  

Answer 3

When people cut you down it starts to affect you. You have to love yourself, but I think it takes a lot of time and maturity.

Love Haleigh<3

Answer 4

Other people putting you down, you being too hard on yourself. Just look in the mirror and look for two beautiful things there every morning. Ignore other people, they're saying those things because they're insecure about those very things. Hope that helps!

x*x

Answer 5

There can be many factors which contribute to a persons self esteem. The reasons can be subtle and can be a combination of factors or events which have had an impact on a person’s life. Listed below are some examples of possible causes of low self esteem.

Rejection

Death and loss

Separation / Divorce of parents

End of a relationship / Divorce

Having an accident

A burglary

Unsuccessful job application(s)

Pressure and stress

Competition

Unemployment

Abuse

Levels of education

Failure

Alcohol / Drug addiction

Here are just a few tips and ideas to help you overcome your low self-esteem.

First of all, despite any imperfections we may have we must love ourselves. How can we even begin to love anyone else, if we have no love for ourselves. This is possibly the most important factor in overcoming low self-esteem. Love who you are.

Next, look at yourself in the mirror. No, not your appearance but deeper. Look into your eyes. Your eyes tell a story. Our eyes are like windows into our souls. Our appearance is just the surface, but our soul is "who" we are. Get to know yourself all over again. Take pride in yourself and in all you do. Always feel good about who you are. Keep in mind everyone goes through hardships in their lives but the way we choose to deal with these hardships is what makes or breaks us.

Another tip is to accept that we each control our lives. We create our future by effort. No one can do it for us. Unfortunately, most people are looking for instant this, instant that, instant success and instant cash. Well, in our world today the only thing you can get instantly is failure. No one wants to work for their success! So what do they do? They give up! Why? Because it is so much easier to fail than to succeed! Take back the control of your life you deserve success as much as the next guy. You just have to accept that you deserve it.

Also, you are not here to please the world (goodness no one has been able to do that yet). You are here to please yourself. What others think of you is unimportant, but what you think of yourself is vital. Often without meaning too our friends and family handicap us with their opinions. But we have minds of our own, although we are always looking for others opinions it doesn't mean we have to follow it. So from now on you do what makes you happy and pleases you. You are what is important here. Not your neighbor or your coworkers or the cashier at the corner store that is always rude to you. Just YOU!

Answer 6

I think when you paint this picture of what a perfect person should look like and if you don't then you don't feel good about yourself

just tell yourself your beautiful..

could also come form abuse and the media

Answer 7

when you get picked on and you overcome them by picking on other people I like to call it a vicious circle  

Answer 8

The main cause of low self-esteem and insecurity problems is simply growing up. Sometimes it gets better, or it gets worse. It can change depending on who you surround yourself with, what you eat, what kind of music you actually listen to, what movies you watch, and one of the biggest has to do with family. There are so many causes, and so little solutions. People choose to overcome them, or completely fall in defeat. So overcoming something that can affect your life so harshly is something that each person experiences seperately. Even if there are a million people who have the same problems with their hair, their nose, ears, height - they all solve or choose not to solve it differently.

Answer 9

Suffering degrading treatment at the hands of those who enjoy that sort of thing...then being abandoned by those you thought would defend you:  that pretty much is the simple recipe...

Overcoming that psychic trauma isn't about making it as though it never happened:  you can't "unhappen" it, but you can take it as a hard life lesson that you learn from- don't let it immobilize you...

Continue interacting with people, but with measured trust only for those meriting it....

Answer 10

I've asked myself this same question.  I'm a mother of two children, ages 10 and 6, and want nothing more than for them to be happy and love who they are.  And I myself have always had a rather low self-esteem.  I don't want my children to feel the way I have felt about myself.  I think there are many things that play a part in developing self-esteem.  

These are some of the things I've come up with...

1.  Knowing you are loved unconditionally by those around you, spec. family.  

2.  Not comparing yourself to others, in regards to looks and to talents.  Everyone is unique.

3.  Developing your own talents.  Nothing makes a person feel good about themselves like having something they are really good at, something that makes them stand out.

4.  Having a positive attitude.  Negative people tend to have lower self-esteems because they dwell on the bad.  For some people, being positive is a natural attribute, but for others like myself, it's a daily struggle.

As for me, I've had to make a point of not complaining about things around my children.  For example, my appearance.  I know that complaining about my weight or hair or whatever around my kids, esp. my daughter, can have lasting negative effects on them.  I've also been trying to be more positive and not dwell on what I don't like about myself.  It's a process, maybe a life long process.

Hope this helped.

Answer 11

Not knowing or getting to know the real you, listening to all the negative things that was said about you or to you,

love is a process so you have to stripe away all the negative things you heard, and try to heal and forgive the ones that did you dirty, cause in the long run, they would forever feel hate within,.  buy doing that to you they think they are easing their pain, Forgive like you never forgive and LOVE like you was put here to do. and enjoy life.

Answer 12

Lots of things cause it from personal experiences to chemical imbalances.  To overcome them, consult a psychiatrist.  They will help you determine the cause and then give you the treatment, either therapy or medication, to overcome it.  

Answer 13

abuse, neglect, many things can cause low self esteem or insecurity. in terms of treatment, therapy is best, but there are good books out, and just keep telling yourself that you're strong--i'm sure you are.

Answer 14

A lot of times its b/c of things that happen to u in ur childhood and as ur growing up. That's not to say its the parent's fault b/c one incident could cause a child's whole outlook to change and that incident may not involve ur parents at all. It all depends on how ur interpret things as a child and as ur growing up. I am a strong believer in counseling and finding good books that u feel will help u along the way.  

Answer 15

As far as insecurity that's part of finding out who you are and being more confident in unsure situations ..that all plays a role. Once you know what you can bring to the world you hold onto it. low self esteem good luck chuck with that one I struggle  daily I sometimes just don't feel good enough and end up putting others first I'm 28 and a work in the progress. I have learned though everthing is how you look at it.

Answer 16

When people always put you down,  

Answer 17

someone infected your mind with bad negative thoughts and you believe them.

you have to know they had an agenda and that they sucked.

Answer 18

when you have insecurity and low self esteem for a long while, or a short time, your start to identify the problem, and then your see specifically how you can make it better.  I find that if you be open, if you be nice to somebody ("what comes around goes around") then you'll not only be surrounded by friendly people, you'll also be discovering one self.  

I think one major part of having low self esteem or insecurity is that the person is out of shape, i don't really know what to say except go lose your weight, eat good, its really a lifelong thing to eat nutritiously, and its really beneficial to learn about it early on.

Typing this, i just realize, that a good thing for someone with low self esteem or insecurity problem to do, is to define what happiness is.

i believe in this quote when i need to...

"Three grand essentials to happiness in this life are something to do, something to love, and something to hope for." - Joseph Addison

Answer 19

There's an old adage that says if you hear something enough, you start to believe it. I find that is one big reason for low self esteem. If you're told by people around you, be they relatives or "friends" that you're not good enough, you start to believe it.

So finding people that will give you support where you need it is a big key to helping you overcome such problems.

Answer 20

Low self esteem results from an emotionally unhealthy childhood.  In my case my parents fought viciously all-day and all-night.  I no longer blame them for all my problems, but they did s***w me up, its just fact.  Your parents and your peers and your overall situation when your young shapes who you will be later in life.  Those children who are taught to love themselves and have confidence will turn out well adjusted.