Question:

What class do you feel you need to enroll your baby in?

by | earlier

I think I'm going to look into a "Squealing Anonymous" class. All he does lately is squeal - a high pitched squeal that gives me goosebumps.

I recommended Ellie to enroll her baby in BMA (Breastmilk Anonymous) the other day.

I just read a question where someone said they needed to send their baby to 'Pacifier Anonymous'.

Which classes does your baby need to attend??????????

:)

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My son needs to be enrolled in "Remember How to Sleep in My Own Bed and Not Wake Up My Parents All Night" class... I thought we were over this at 4 months - he will be a year old tomorrow and has been up EVERY night at some ungodly hour crying for us to come get him for the last 3 weeks.... Separation anxiety rears its ugly head!!! Boo!!
Report (0) (0) | earlier
"Be Content for more than 2 minutes Anonymous" :) LOL...

My Daughter is not a very content baby at all! She constantly wants to be moving/doing something different-And, don't get me wrong its a good thing because she wants to see her surroundings but sometimes its hard to get anything done ( Especially cleaning, laundry, ect....)

But, She is who she is and I love her anyway...But,Im wondering what she will be like as a Toddler? She might just whip my butt into shape! ESPECIALLY when she starts walking! HAHAHA!!!!!!!
Report (0) (0) | earlier
I would definitely have to go with Dinosaur Anonymous. My son is obsessed with them... He could spend all day as a velociraptor. :)

Possibly also picking up facial/verbal expressions not fit for a 4 year old from older cousins anonymous. (PUFVENFFAFYOA)
Report (0) (0) | earlier
A little late....but Emma needs to be in too attached to mommy's hip .....she is really making my MIL literally cry (she is a big baby anyways) b/c she won't go to her!

Oh and Emma has to go that squealing class also....really no one baby can be louder than she is. Her favorite time to squeal is during church....I think she thinks she is singing. Her dad is starting to think it is time to teach her to be quit.....uggghhhh dread.
Report (0) (0) | earlier
yelling anonymous - she yells a lot

taggies anonymous - for some reason, my daughter has thing with tags

she would only play with stuffed toys that still had the tags on it- and she can't be fooled! we got he this "taggies blanket" but she doesnt like it!!she likes the real tags that u have to take off after you buy the toy.

bathaholic anonymous - she would cry and throw a tantrum when i take her out of her tub after her bath.
Report (0) (0) | earlier
wakes mommy up with a big p**p every morning anonymous. haha

its a little long, but im sure there will be others in his class. or at least i hope i'm not the only one who's baby gives them a present each morning. i mean, forget the smell of coffee in the morning.
Report (0) (0) | earlier
LOL I thought you were serious...and I was all ready with my answer ...

Infant Swim Resource...it's an excellent excellent water survival class for infants...we just finished it and it's amazing. http://www.infantswim.com/

Luke needs to go to "Whiney Around Grandma" and "Kissin on the Dog" Anonymous.

Seriously...if he's not whining to get something from his sucker of a grandma....he's making out with the dog...I swear I can't take my eyes off him for a second...lol.

Report (0) (0) | earlier
Mine will be joining Johnny, for sure; save him a spot!!
Report (0) (0) | earlier
Definitely Pacifier Anonymous.

Landon can't go to sleep or even play for very long without his nunu.
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I'm with first time mom on this. Ian needs to be enrolled in "yelling anonymous" ...his favorite form of communication is wearing on our nerves!!! Anyone thought of a "no-no anonymous class yet?? Lately he's be telling me 'no no no no no' to everything! 'no no' when I clean him up, 'no no' when I put him on the changing table, 'no no' when I turn Barney off....I thought it was the terrible 2s that they started with the 'no no's, but at 11 months Ian's decided telling us 'no no' and screaming is the best way to get what he wants when he wants it!
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hissy fit when i dont get my way anonymous (HFWIDGMW)
Report (0) (0) | earlier
He is currently enrolled in f**t-Future American Rippers and Tooters

and

EWW-Eat Whenever Whatever

Report (0) (0) | earlier
Riley is a pretty good baby, except for lately because he's been teething--he's had 6 teeth break through in 2 weeks. So maybe temporary whiners anonymous.

I know this is the "baby" section but I have to add that Tyler (my 3 year old) needs to attend "Patient Awareness". He is the most impatient little boy I have ever met. When he wants something, he wants it NOW or he doesn't stop whining...add "Whiners Annonymous" to his curriculum too.

EDIT: I think Riley will be joining Aaron at f**t...man that little boy passes more gas than an adult man!!
Report (0) (0) | earlier
I think anger management would be best for Lily or perhaps how to remain calm when things don't go your way classes at least. She really is a good baby but the tantrums where she hits, scratches or bits leaves me wondering what its going to be like when she is two (she is only 8 months now)- isn't early intervention best?lol
Report (0) (0) | earlier
One for babies with a penchant for only leaking p**p on their dads... what would that be called?

"Hi, I'm Alli and I can't stop leaking p**p on my daddy ONLY"
Report (0) (0) | earlier
lol

None.  My twins are perfect.

hahahahahahaha... you didn't fall for that either, huh?

Ok.

For one of them I will send her to "Throwing food anonymous" and the other to "Yellers anonymous"
Report (0) (0) |   earlier
vampires anonymous

OUCH!!!!!!!!! I swear he didn't get it from his mother or father!!!!!!!!
Report (0) (0) | earlier
Mine needs to go to "Hand Suckers Anonymous"

Report (0) (0) | earlier
Ben has been enrolled in BMA. Thank you for the suggestion.

When he completes his BMA program we will be enrolling him in SHMITFWBFA (Stop Hitting Mom in the The Face While Breast Feeding Anonymous) and then PSTYCOTDFA (Please Stop Throwing Your Cheerios on the Darn Floor Anonymous).

You're too funny :-)

(Hey..shouldn't you be leaving to go pick up Johnny by now?)

Edit: Ha ha...give Aaron's Mommy best answer!! Though I think all of these answers are hysterical!!!
Report (0) (0) | earlier
Definitely the BGWA: Big Girl Whiners Anonymous.

I tell her the whining hurts my ears and she sounds like a baby (she hates being called a baby nowadays). She usually then says, "I'm not a baby" in an even more annoying whiny voice.
Report (0) (0) | earlier
"Pulling Hair Anonymous"

"Eating Big Brother's Food Off the Floor Anonymous"

"Waking Up at 5:30 AM Anonymous" (and I personally believe he needs to attend a rehab center for this one......it is pushing me over the edge)
Report (0) (0) | earlier
Pulling hair anonymous

She pulls my hair and she pulls hr on hair and makes her-self cry

She is 5 months
Report (0) (0) | earlier
my baby needs to go to sleepy head anonymous hes been sleeping like a rock lately

EDIT: also i need to send him to throw up anonymous! lol
Report (0) (0) | earlier