What do I do? I can't stand her!!?

Question

I love my fiance, and he is a really sweet and caring individual- too caring. He is nice to everyone. His friend is a pretty boy and really shallow. The girls that aren't the best looking he'll do them and call it a day. He does have a nice personality, and I can see why my fiance really likes him as a friend.

However, I disagree with what he and his "friends with benefits" did. He messed with a co-worker while she was still living with her boyfriend, so in essence, she cheated on him with my fiance's friend. Also, I tried to get to know her, but she was grinding up on my fiance's friends and flirting like crazy, saying how she is so hot, and she's the hottest girl ever. (She was still with her boyfriend at the time.) I still tried not to judge and get to know her, but she always makes reference to how good

she is at making out, and how big her t*ts are. (This is always when other guys are there and my fiance.) How am I supposed to react to that? Another point I would like to make is that my fiance told her she was pretty. She told me this. He said it was because she was

crying and he wanted to make her feel better. I understand but I still don't like that he did it. How am I supposed to be around his friends? I can stand the pretty boy friend, but not his f*ck buddy. She is so annoying. When she was grinding up with her friends, her boyfriend wasn't there. I trust my fiance, I just can't stand his friend's f*ck buddy.

I know that I will have to be around them a lot because my fiance's friends like to hang out a lot, and I know that she will be there. I secretly hope she and him have a huge argument or something, or she moves back to where she used to live. Anybody that vain, I don't care if it's a guy or a girl, is a pain to be around. My fiance says he doesn't care about her, but he says I should just get along with her just to get along. It's a bit hard, though, when she is constantly saying things for "Shock Value." ARGGHH! She told my fiance that she is not a homewrecker and that she wants to be friends with me, and she told me that I'm lucky to have him. Yeah, that's all fine and all, but the only way I can be friends with her is if she changes her dam personality.

Answer 1

She won't last long. As someone above said, guy's do talk and eventually she will slip up.

It sounds like you can trust your guy, but don't trust her.  She already knows that she can get sympathy from him (the crying and him telling her she is pretty) She will try again. And if the situation is right she will try to come onto him. That's what this type of girl does.

I hope everything goes well.

Answer 2

Just cause they all want you to befriend her doesn't mean you have to. You shouldn't let it get to you because, frankly, I don't think it's your business what your man's friend does with women. Understandable that she's annoying and immature and all, but everyone has to be around someone that they want to murder at some point. It doesn't sound like she (or your fiance's friend, for that matter) is in it for the long haul so she probably won't be around for long. I think it's sweet that your fiance tried to comfort her though, even if he didn't mean it. And at least she's not messing around or even flirting with your guy. Just don't start any unnecessary conflict, and I think that things will resolve themselves soon. This chick could be doing a lot worse things and you should try not to get so worked up about it.

Answer 3

well there's not much you can really do. just keep your distance from her and it's fine for you to dislike her but keep it to yourself  if she dosen't change your feelings for her dont have to change, but know one else but you has to know, so basicly bottle it up when she's around(to keep the peace) and when she's gone, take a deep breath and thank god its over  

Answer 4

It's simple. You don't have to be friends with her, just be civil to her. If she's not civil back, then take the high road - don't freak out - and just ignore her. If she becomes clingy and wants to go everywhere with you, ask your fiance if he's okay with you lying to her about being able to get together - if he says no, just try your hardest to bear it, or take that girl aside and explain (very kindly, without sarcasm) that you would rather not spend so much time with her because you dislike how she acts in public. She'll probably get mad, but try to console her and tell her that you know this is your problem, not hers - you just don't want to be around her so much. Lol maybe you could find a different way to word it if possible so it's a little nicer. Anyway, if your fiance doesn't like that you told that to his friend's *buddy*, explain to him that you absolutely can't stand her and if you'd had to stay with her any longer you might have blown up in her face. Good luck.

P.S. I also agree with armaj70 - you probably won't have to deal with her for very long, so unless by some weird chain of events she ends up marrying your fiance's friend, you might as well try to bear it until she's out of your life.

Answer 5

Ok. Well, I kind of know how you feel. One of my girl friends has a friend who is a total s***k. She wears the sluttiest clothes and makeup ever and does exactly what you described. I hate being around her because she is always talking about how great she looks. The only thing that allows me to put up with being around her is that I know that that is ALL she has to offer. Her personality is nonexistent because she just wants physical attention. I know that she is doing this because she is insecure about herself and worried that if she were to change no one would pay attention to her. I feel sorry for her and glad that I am not in her shoes. So, hope that helps. :)

Answer 6

Well i would talk to your fiance about how you feel.

and i would also give the f*ck a piece of my mind.

i couldn't stand to even be around that girl she seems like a total b*tch.

Answer 7

The next time she talks about how “fabulous” she is you should ask her, “Why do you always need to boost your image around us? Do you have that much of a low self esteem that you can’t stop complementing yourself?” Lol. I love it. I did the same thing to my cousin who was full of herself. Ironically, she later confessed to me that – that is EXACTLY why she does it. And I’m suspecting it’s why this girl does it. Cuz the truly fabulous (like u & me) don’t need to flaunt it. Everyone around us can already see it.

I think you should be cordial around her but you don’t have to like her. Besides, someone like that is hard to trust. God forbid this friend dumps her, you know who she’s gonna try to go after to make HERSELF feel better? I’m completely sure you fiancé will put her in her place if she ever tried but it’s better to not try to force any feelings.

If you end up liking her fine, but until then just be cordial.

Answer 8

Stand firm with your fiance and your values. Having to put up with this female must be exhausting and a waste of your time.Simply refuse to associate with her-that's that-you're engaged to your fiance-not to his friends. Maybe you and your fiance could take up a new interest which would be a good excuse to spend less time around this female-unless you feel you can take her aside and compassionately explain the effect her behaviour has on people-she may be ADD or bi-polar and not know how out of control she is.

Answer 9

Sit. Think. Get your facts and your feeling apart. Facts she is trashy she will do anything to get attention she will NOT CHANGE. You will have to be the one to make things less awkward for yourself and your guy. You can keep telling yourself she just attention seeking and a nuisance or you can just let her know that she is a attention seeker.

You can remind her whenever she acts up.

Answer 10

Ok I think I fell asleep reading your life story.  If you can't stand her then don't hang out with her.  

Answer 11

She sounds like a s**t and That's why everyone likes her! She is also a cheater and she needs to get a life

Hope this helps!

Answer 12

idk

Answer 13

Been there done that. Believe me when I say  that the  guys will get bored with her  in the not too distant future. Once she has banged a couple of them  (and guys DO  talk) they will get tired of such a trashy girl who is in their faces all the time. Hang in there. Just be polite to her  and maintain a  dignified silence, class always wins out over trashiness in the end.

Answer 14

wow.......ummmm..........I think you just needed to vent there.......fight that ho