What do I do about my mum not letting me move out?

Question

In a few years my sister and I will be 18 and 19 and have decided when we're at uni we'll get a part time job and rent out a flat together. We're muslims but have been living in England for all our life. When I told my mum what we were planning on doing she told us we're crazy and that she wasn't going to let us live like English people because it's "not right" in our culture for young girls to be living independantly. My dad is muslim too but fine about the idea. Legally we'd be allowed to so should we move out anyway?

Answer 1

just move out, you'll be 18 and you'll be allowed to do what you want

Answer 2

As long as your of age you can do whatever u like as long as it isn't illegal immoral or dangerous to your health.

Answer 3

In a few years...A lot can change. When your 18 do what you want.  

Answer 4

It depends how much you want to upset your mum and stick to your faith. I think it must be very difficult for young Muslims to live by the constraints of their faith whilst living in a democratic society where people are permitted and encouraged to enjoy their individuality and freedom. It must be very tempting to question some of the rules and taste the western ways. Your mother is probably worried that a taste of independence will lead you astray and into trouble.

When the time comes, you might find that she will be more accepting of the idea. Having your dad agree to the idea is half the battle.

I wish you much luck in finding your independence as I believe everyone should have the right to make such choices.  

Answer 5

yes I'm sure your tired of her asinine rules by now

Answer 6

I know someone in a similar situation and i would advise her to just move out! if its what you need your mother can't stop you and has no right to do so! make it clear to her you still care and love her and she will probably be angry but make an effort to show her you weren't just doing it to p**s her off, but you were doing it for self growth and experiences. Also make it clear to her that you are a responsible young adult and wont get into drugs etc.  

Answer 7

legally your mum cant do anything about it so live your life how you want to

Answer 8

Just move out your 18 theres nothing she can  do x

Answer 9

Live with your mummy while you can.. when you got married you can move out..

Answer 10

Just try and convince your mum that you are responsible enough, and that your living in an English culture and you just wanna fit in with what everyones doing. Legally, yes you re just allowed to move out. But you said in a few years..maybe you would have changed your mind or maybe she would have?

Answer 11

ask yourself this questions. why is it so important to live away from home? would it be better to stay with your family? life is short and one thing i have learned is that, at least in my case, when things get tough the only people thats going to be by your side will be your family. i am mexican and think very much like your mom families should stay together,  

Answer 12

Do it tell her that everyone else is doing it and you don't want to be left out if she still says No do it anyway

Answer 13

What your mom should say is that she wouldn't like it if you moved out on your own. She can't actually stop you. Why would she have a problem with you living like English people, when you've been living all your life? Apparently, the people you live around are suitable enough to make friends with otherwise, your parents would've chose to move elsewhere.

Although you may be muslim, there has to come a time when you're living for yourself, as you would like to live. You can't live for your parents as adults. There is nothing wrong with being independent and being on your own. It doesn't suggest that you're being improper in any way. You can still honor your muslim heritage and live the way you want. That's what being an adult is all about, making choices that make sense and reflect who you are as a person.

If I were in your position, I'd move out anyway. I would let my mother know that I appreciate her opinion but that I had to live my life as I saw fit. I would remind her that I've always been a good kid who made responsible choices and that wouldn't change now that I was an adult.  

Answer 14

Do it anyways

Answer 15

you are still young why would you want to pay for rent,water,elec,gas,tax,food etc when you get it for free or not much at you mum and dads. think of the thing you could do with the money clothes,cars,clubs,holidays. or safe alittle for a house when you are bit older.

live first

Answer 16

You must make your own decisions. You will be a young adult and legally entitled to move out. Make it clear you love her but want to make your own way and your own mistakes and promise her you will conduct yourself in the correct manner your religion dictates. Prove yourself and she will be proud of you. You can always move back if it doesn't work out.