What do i do? i need advice. is what i am doing wrong?

Question

i have a long story,

i wont go into detail.

but i am moving out of home, i am 16 years old and doing year 11.

i want to get out cos i want to finish year 12 and i dont think i will as things are.

my mum is controlling and manipulative and the biggest liar i know.

she is telling everyone i have a mental illness and both anorexia AND bulemia.

i have it from 3 councillors and my gp that i dont.

she says, they're wrong.she herself sees a councillor once a week.,

she got her councilling through victims of crime although she hasnt been abused.

she got mine through that too which confused my councillor.

i dont know what she told them. but i have never been abused either.

i cant live at my dads, as to start with i was worried my issues with my step mother would make life difficult.

about a year ago she got upset by me not liking something she pointed out to me for xmas (not that i knew that she just was asking if i liked it) after is was told i wasn't 'elligable' for a xmas prezzie after i got a new guitar earlier in the year, and went home, called my dad told him i was a s**t, then tried to make him choose between me and her.

she is a medicated bipolar.

my dad is an unmedicated depressive.

he was fine until last night he told me

-i was just as bad, no, worse than my mother ever was

-ive been bullshitting to everyone

-i betrayed him by wanting to leave

-he doesnt like me, or the person i am

-he doesnt want to talk to me

-he doesnt love me. he might want to, but he doesnt.

apparently i have been twisting peoples words (which is what my mother does) so i put it in bullet points.

and missed some things out.

i am so tired of everything.

i know leaving will not help my relationship, but it seems it is already gone, and i need to finish my HSC...

he says no matter what i do, he will no longer support me through uni or anything he wouldve done, as i dont respect him.

he has done SO much to support me financially in my musical ventures (i am a songwriter, performer, guitarist, singer, if you want to hear what he thinks is my lack of talent i have songs on www.jjjunearthed.com/morgansheather i got to number 5 on the pop charts... so yeh)

but he never thought i would get anywhere with it. and made it very clear to me.

but i am supposedly not grateful for his support, even though it came at the price of me hearing about how he 'only did it cos i wanted it, not cos i would ever make anything of myself'

there is alot more to the story, but i am so tired of this.

is what i am doing wrong?

i have been offered a place to stay with my boyfriends family.

apparently thats the only reason i am going, cos my life isnt hard.

i dont know what doing it tough is...

please help me...

Answer 1

go to your boyfriend your parents are BS* (no offense)

Answer 2

i'm sorry for your stress and family problems.  

what you have to do is ask yourself:

"whats more important, family or hsc? at this moment"

"will i be able to achieve what i need to in order to be successful in life, if i stay?"

"where can i feel more loved and secure?"

and lastly

"wat do i really want?" (i know that is why you are asking, but think, if i go live with my bf, then.......

if i stay with my mom/dad, then...

either way, what decision you make will determine your future.  choose carefully.

if i were you, i'd choose my bf's...you can always visit you're parents....

Answer 3

Your parents are not your responsibility.  Instead of giving you the support and stability which you need, they are giving you a huge amount of stress and worry.  Think only of yourself and your own needs in this situation - I think your boyfriend's family offer you the best option at this point.  If it were just moving in with your bf, I'd advise caution, but as you will still be in a family environment, probably with more supportive parenting figures around, go for it.  Discuss with them what would happen if things didn't work out with your bf though.  you don't want to be jumping out of the frying pan into the fire.  You sound like a very intelligent and level headed girl with great prospects for the future - don't let anyone take these away from you.  Keep in touch with your parents, but don't accept responsibility for them - they both have mental illnesses which are not your fault and which you can do nothing to diminish.  Good luck for your future - I wish you every success.

Answer 4

I know that you have hard time, thats not good and not right!

Think positive and do the thing that you feel good with, for to feel better. Things in your life will be ok in time. You need to be happy in life so get to talk with a person you trust, think few times before you do something.

Lets hope for the best.

Answer 5

im really sorry i dont think your wrong that is actually like the only right choice you have

but what if you and your boyfriend end things will your parents let you back in even after you moved out if so then going with your boyfriend is great!!!!! x]

Answer 6

Oh dear. complicated life u have at 16. Everything what you do is right. good luck.

Answer 7

For now you should focus only on the HSC and keep your mind on your work since the exams are in October which isnt much further from now, trust i know. you should for now ignore any movements by anyone against you until after october HSC. idealy you need to move or stay in a stable envoironment, one in which you can study. it is up to you to decide the best place. Getting a high mark in the HSC will not open any doors or even be required to do a music career however it certainly does help and later on your ideas may change, a high UAI will enable you to still be able to change your mind. Remember while these fightings may only last a few years, a degree will give you a lifetime of support. focus on yourself.