What do i do if me and my friend cant agree on the same parenting skills?

Question

my best friend and i are WAY different on how we raise our kids. she lets her brats do everyth they wanna do and i am a more strict parent with kids that have respect for ppl. how do we continue being friends with our kids playing together?

Answer 1

That's simple. You raise your kids, let her raise yours. Yeah, you'll have the issue 'but so and sos mum lets her eat mud..' or something like that. And it will seem unfair to them that they can't do the same things, but they can still play together, and you can still see your friend. If your child was playing with these kids who wern't your friends kids, would it be an issue, or would you just make sure that your rules still applied to them?

Good luck.

Answer 2

I think it's all a matter of respecting one anothers ideals in regards to parenting. Friendships often comes down to respect. Any sort of relationship, for that matter, I suppose. Sort of, agree to disagree. Maybe the two of you could find time to go out sometime without the kids and discuss it. Let her know that you don't want her being critical of your parenting style, and tell her you will respect her difference in opinions if she will do the same. I certainly dislike when people try to tell me how to raise my kid. I ask for advice when I need it, but otherwise, I'd appreciate others kept it to themselves. I'm sure you've experienced the same!

Answer 3

Life is all about compromise and tolerating the people in our society.  She probably raises her children close to how she was raised and you two ended up being friends so as you can see people are raised differently and we learn to be tolerant of them.  If her children are negatively influencing your children ( which can happen in a school setting anyway so it's better that you can actually be present when it happens in this situation) then you may want to limit time with her kids but if she is a good friend and you enjoy spending time with her then it's not worth cutting off ties because she chooses different parenting than you.

Answer 4

You will have to agree to disagree. Been there myself, it is hard but the friendship might be worth it.

Answer 5

I think it depends on how your children and her children interact with each other.   Do they play well together? Or are her children mean, selfish and hurtful to your kids?    Obviously, you can't allow her children to harm yours in any way.

However, if it's just a matter of her children being allowed more freedom than yours,  I think you can maintain the friendship by setting whatever rules you feel are necessary in YOUR home.  So when you and she get together at your house, the kids have to abide by YOUR rules.  At her house, then things get done her way, but you still have a right to impose whatever rules you think are appropriate for your own children.  

It sounds like you really want to keep the friendship, and that your friend is important in your life.  Since that is the case, just maintain control over what you can, and let the rest go.

Answer 6

Really as long as you believe you are doing a good job then it doesn't matter what other people think.. no two parents have the same technique when it comes to parenting.. What works for you may not work for another and vice versa... Kids are gonna pick up habits from other kids good or bad, your job is to just make sure that they know right from wrong