What do i do with my 15 year old son

Question

what do i do when my 15 year old is ruining my life? he thinks he is the man of the house and treats me like dirt, he is meant to be in at 11.30pm the other night he said he had to go out at 1am i said no he wasnt but he went out anyway and had fight and came in at 4am with no explanation and later on in day said so i had to unless you wanted your windows put in. he lies all the time and treats house like hotel pals in constantly eating everything, smoking in house drinking (i dont work through disability so not alot of money)even though i try to stop him he just wont listen. i have phoned social sevices for help but no one got back to me anyone any ideas on what to do. friends say throw him out but i cant he my son and 16 in december. he always fighting going to court in few mths for serious assault charges already might end up in prison

Answer 1

Next time he goes out after hours, tell him if he goes out you'll lock the door and he wont get back in.

Then do it and don't give in.

Once you've done this a couple of times and he's been stuck out in the cold, he'll start doing what he's told.

Answer 2

How about this:  don't depend on the government to fix your problems, i.e. disability and social services.  Take charge of your life and your son's life too.  Who is the adult and parent in this relationship???

Answer 3

find a boyfriend (pretend) and whoop his little ***!

Answer 4

try getting a uncle to talk to him and tell him how upset u are.

hope this helps good luck! :)

Answer 5

You have to lock him out for both your sakes. If he threatens you then call the police. You are only making things worse by not disciplining him.

Answer 6

If i were you I would listen to your friends. Kick him out. literally when he goes out, lock the door, if he has a key change locks or get  another one so he can't get in. If he tries to break it down, threaten to call the police. Put some stuff in a black bag and place it out side the door and ignore him shouting to get in etc. He needs some tough love to soften his heart.

If he tries to play victim and asks "where am i going to go" still put your foot down, and be tough and say "to be honest i don't care, your making my life a misery and you have time to think about that and when you come back and say sorry and change your behaviour i might consider letting you back in".

As harsh as it may seem you really need to do that. I learnt from personal experience, my older brother was worse and sometimes still can be, he even hit me with a chain once, he smashed up a BMW we had, done drugs etc. So if i was you before he gets any worse, be tough. He will soon learn who means most when his so called mates say he can't stay at their house.

Answer 7

i suggest getting a male close family member to talk to him, because it does appear like he is missing a father figure to keep him in check.

Answer 8

Where I live, if a kid was miss behaving, we would say, "he needs a good kick up the ***". Try taking away his phone, i pod etc. Don't let him out of the house after school. Stop him from seeing his friends for awhile. it usually does the trick. If he tries to hurt you then ring the police. If he continues this way you are looking at, a bad future for him. You are the parent with the control, not the other way around. You need to lay down the rules and make sure he follows them. I know he is only 15 but threaten to kick him out of your house. As for his friends coming to your home, don't let them in, in the first place. Tell them to get out of your house or you will call the cops.

I really hope you can get him under control. Good luck!!

Answer 9

When I was 15, I took for granite all the things my mom did for me. So she showed me tough love. It's your house and your rules, and if he doesn't want to abide by them, then he try to find someplace else to live. As for drinking and smoking and friends, you can kick his friends out, call their parents, as for being home by curfew, each city sets a curfew, call the police they will make sure he comes home or they will put him in juvy. Sounds harsh, but if he's ruining your life like you say he is, then it will be worth it.

Or even better yet, try calling Maury, or Dr. Phil. they will straighten him out!

Answer 10

i know this might sound strange but this does work get as many of your friends over overpower him and strip him this he wont like then you dress him in knickers,tights,skirt and heels and bundle him into a car and all you girls parade him around the town everyone will laugh at him and say if he dont improve you will keep on doing this to him

Answer 11

i would beat the craap out of him. because this kids needs to learn to respect his own mother. you really need to show him who boss. i would get some one to kick his a55  

Answer 12

id say you put him in boot camp or military school..they'll straiten him out..and if you dont wanna do that..they just try more to enfore the law in your house..if he still doesnt listen..let him do what he wants..its his life he's gonna s***w up..if he gets caught for curfew, dont pick him up from the police station right away..let him sit in juvie...and if he ever wants or needs a ride someplace..tell him you wont do it unless he does want you want him to first..and make sure to always keep your keys in your site..and if your sleeping..put them somewhere where he wont find them..dont give in to his requests...if he wants to be a tough guy and act like and adult..make him get a job...then he'll really have to act like one.and he wont like it soo much..anyways..thats about all i can say to help..good luck.

Answer 13

Look, you are the women of the house, you NEED to deal with it, and you NEED to put your foot on the line and tell him this cannot carry on. You need to do it, because if you don't, you WILL regret it. I'm 15 also and I just couldn't treat my own parents like that, get in touch with the social services again and demand them, please, just do it, you do not deserve this, it doesn't matter weather he is big or not.  

Answer 14

You need to go on Jeremy Kyle :(

Answer 15

First of all, you need to put your foot down. What you say is the LAW in your house. Don't let him have any money, lock your money up, and that will help prevent smoking and drinking. If worst comes to worse, you may have to call some type of youth/teen help program. Have him sit in juvy for a day, or something like boot camp. When they take him to court, don't let them charge a fine, make sure you tell them that fines do nothing to correct your son, make them give him community service. Believe me, I was somewhat of a problem when I was a young teen under mom's roof, but, if I got into trouble, she talked them into community service and I learned a LOT quicker than when she paid a fine and then complained for having to pay it. I would take EVERYTHING away from him when he refuses to listen. If he walks out the door when you say no, then drag his **** back in the door. Sounds harsh, but, the kid doesn't seem to listen any other way. Obviously, don't beat him, but grabbing him by the arm and forcing him back into the house should be fine.  

Answer 16

send him to the naughty step

Answer 17

Dear Mom,

The only way your son will learn is to get a taste of his own medicine, this means he will need to do time in a boot-camp where he will do what he is told when he is told and not be allowed any freedom.  Freedom is earned not freely given.  No boy and I say BOY should treat his mom like that and your not guilt free.  You share in this problem.  You apparently have allowed your son to have total control and it's time you take control back.  If it was my son, trust me his attitude would be much better or he would be in Boot-Camp or spend the weekend in a county jail for a taste of his future.

Answer 18

He sounds like he is lacking a father figure in his life. Get an uncle, or a male friend or yours to pull him to the side for a talk sometime and scare the life out of him 'you are killing your mother', 'if this goes on I can guarantee you'll be in trouble with me boy.' No physical violence, just scare the life out of him, maybe even threaten him. That's no way to treat a parent, or a lady for that matter.

It appears that this is the only way the boy will learn, through a more stern force.

EDIT: Your brother needs to threaten him, or punch him about a bit. Be cruel to be kind.

Answer 19

Sounds like he will be taken away soon... You could try sitting him down and explaining what being a real man is all about. To take responsibility for your self and others. It has nothing to do with drinking and fighting this is a sign of weakness. Tell him first he has to gain respect for himself before others will... Trouble is at 15 you think you know it all and in reality you know nothing...Best of luck

Answer 20

have him visit a prison. get ahold of one of the local prisons and sometimes they let the kids do overnight stays. they do in ny where i live. it scares the c**p out of some kids because they talk to prisoners and realize this could be them. or boot camp.