What do i need to do to to adobt my friends 3 month old son?

Question

my friend that i grew up with had a baby 3 months ago, but now has a problem that caused her not to be able to take care of her baby. she tried to have her parents take care of the baby for a little while and i been helping by baby sitting and things because her parents are to old to take care of the baby. my friend has now asked if I would be willing to adopt him so that she and the grandparents could still see the baby because i live across the street from them and so they know he has a good home with me,my husband and my 2 kids because we all love her baby so much.me and her grew up together and are like sisters she said that she wants me to raise the baby and she will still be around to see him as much as possible and shes not abandoning him she just wants him to have a more stable home and enviroment to grow up in with a family that can take care of him the way he needs to be. i said I would adopt him but my problem is I'm not sure what i have to do to be able to adopt her baby

Answer 1

Where is the baby's father? I doubt you can adopt without him agreeing to an adoption. His rights as a parent would precede any prospective aparent.

Answer 2

Why would you want to take your friend's baby away from her?  Don't you feel like you would be betraying your friendship?  Have you considered guardianship so that she does not have to legally abandon her child?  What about the father?  It is obvious that the family is interested in the child so why do you want to sever their legal relationship?

What will you tell the child?  I just don't get it.

Answer 3

You need to hire a lawyer who specializes in adoption. The laws are different in each state. As far as I know, you each need to hire a lawyer -- she and you. I would also seriously advise you to seek some counseling in regard to your plan. I think it is wonderful but has some likely built in issues that should not be ignored. Your friend needs to understand that her legal rights will be completely terminated and in the eyes of the law she will have no rights to the child whatsoever. You and your husband will become the parents in every way. It certainly sounds nice for everyone that your friend will live so nearby but, that can also cause problems. What if you disagree over parenting issues -- to a certain extent, it is not realistic to think that you won't. Parents have huge diagreements among themselves over parenting styles. This is an incredibly hard thing for a friendship to endure. And your friend and you need to realize that you or she could also choose to move away and end up with no recourse as to any rights for either of you or for the child. For the child's benefit, it is VERY important that the child know his true story and it is also VERY important that he have one set of parents who are totally in charge of his care. It is not okay for you to end up co-parenting this child. The child needs to understnad who his parents are and who is in charge of him. That might sound straight forward but, it absolutely isn't in some circumstances -- unforseen ones in particular. I strongly suggest you and your friend talk over some major issues together before you take on this permanent and enormous responsibility. Good luck!!

Answer 4

I would contact an Adoption Atty in your area...they will guide you.  You will need a Home Study....the Atty may be able to get you in the right direction with that too.

You will need to pay for her atty and between you, her, and both atty's you will need to come up with an agreement as to contact with the child (ie.  if you move...).  All that needs to be discussed beforehand so the mother is not under a different understanding.  Congrats to you.

Answer 5

The first thing you need to do is to get an attorney to get all the paperwork needed for her and the father to terminate their parental rights and to nominate you and your husband to adopt the baby. The attorney will help you find a Social Worker who can do a home study for you. This has to be done before an adoption can happen. In accordance with your state laws, there is a waiting period in which the parents can change their minds about terminating their rights. Oh, when you see the attorney, make sure to get a document that gives you temporary custody of the baby until the adoption is final. Good Luck, from a mom of 2 adopted children and one on the way.

Answer 6

I would speak to a lawyer who deals with adoptions. He will explain what paperwork needs to be submitted. :) And good for you!

Answer 7

Go to a good solicitor

Answer 8

Hopefully the problem is a temporary sort.

Gardianship would be a good solution.

Answer 9

You keep asking this question and the answer doesn't change. You need to get an adoption lawyer.  It's going to cost you money.  This is not a do-it-yourself project.  You will also need to  get the father of the child to sign off on giving up his rights or prove that he is unfit (drug addict, for instance).  This child isn't just hers.

Answer 10

Contact the local social services agency. I would try to see if you could foster him so she is not terminating all rights. What if you move in 4 years and she throws a fit and tries to stop you? Or what if in ten years she just changes her mind? It is best to go through all the legit steps and then maybe go from foster care to adoption but after she has had time to think things over. A new baby is overwhelming to anyone-she needs to have time to think. And you need to have protection for yourself and your family in place. Better to foster him first, then adopt. Plus if he is a foster you may be able to ge some financial help with the situation. Good Luck.