What do i tell my baby?

Question

How do i tell my baby about his mother when hes older, his mother died well giving birth to him they could save bradon but not my whife and his mother. Its hard anofe dealing with her death and my other 3 childeren but with them being 14 11 and 9 its a lilttle easier for them to under stand, and now im worrying about telling him and what if he thinks its his fault. Ohhh man i need help he is only 2 weeks now but in about 2 years i think he will start wondering and when he gets into day-care and school he will see all the other kids with there moms and dads wont he wonder?

Answer 1

I'm so sorry for your loss!

First, start telling him as soon as possible in words he can understand. If he knows from the beginning why his mom isn't around it won't as big of an issue when it comes up in school or conversation. Give him more details as he gets older and asks more questions. Make sure to tell him lots of great stories about his mom (as I'm sure you will anyway) and tell him how much she loved him when she was pregnant even though she never got to meet him. Take the focus away from how she died and direct it toward how great of a woman she was and how much you all still love her. Your other children can help with this too and you may find that it helps you all heal a little more as you reflect more positively on such a tragic situation.

Good luck and I would highly recommend seeking some kind of professional counseling for you and your children so that everyone can learn how to process grief in their own ways. They will probably also be able to give you advice on how to approach the topic as your baby grows up.