What do we need to know about adopting through fostering and/or privately?

Question

Please give info on costs, process length, parental age restrictions, differences between the two processes, and anything else u think I need 2 know. Currently have one biological son (school age); does that matter? We want to adopt a girl ages 2-7 peferably white, hispanic, or native american with few to no learning disabilities. I don't want to sound like I'm "shopping" for a child. However, we know what we can handle at this point in our lives. Please, only serious responses to my above question.

Answer 1

First off, the differences between adopting privately and fostering to adopt. HUGE!!!  Privately you are going to spend around $15,000 for an American child, and wait until you are chosen, or if the agency charges you the right fee, they will find a birth parent for you. (Read as more money) You will pay some costs for the birth parent, agency fee, court, etc. That's all spelled out. Just find a good agency. Make sure if you want open or closed adoption, and how open you can handle, stick to your guns. Don't start promising the world because there is a possible baby. You can be held to it. Some open adoptions are a letter and pictures once a year. Others can be where the birth mother wants to come and visit. So make sure what you can handle before you go in.  Also, private is less stressfull. Believe it or not.

Now, as for your no learning disability. Ummmm..... you can go anywhere in the world, adopt from anyone in the world, have surrogates, whatever;even give birth. There are no guarantees that a child will be perfect. Nothing will tell you if that child will have a learning disability later in life. As with adoption from anywhere in the world, nothing can tell you of any genetic problems, or inherited problems, nor can they guarantee that the birth mother stayed clean, and got medical care the entire time. It's a risk.

With foster to adopt children though, there are various programs put into place that are there for just in case there is a problem. Support, training, medical help, therapists, tutors, you name it. Best of all, it's free. Those exact same things can be wrong with any other adopted child but are not covered because they were done through a private agency.

I've seen it.

The first thing to do, is to check with your County,State for their programs and how they work. There are various programs out there. You can choose the age you want, right down to an infant. You can choose exposure, abuse, ect.  Even then though, they don't always know. They have to go on what they are told. A two to 7 year old is likely to have been in the system longer and have more emotional problems. Although, some do come into care at that age. So don't count them out completely.  

Plus at that age they are considered harder to place and will be easier to adopt. With any child that first comes into care, you will have to work with the worker and the child. You won't know for sure that this one is your forever child. It's stressful and heartbreaking at times. There are great workers and judges out there, and then there are some bad ones too. It just all depends.

However, with your private agency, you have to pay around $5,000 seperately for a Home Study. Your home Study and training with your State is free. Once a child is placed in your home you will receive a subsidy payment monthly to take care of the child until the child is adopted by your family. The child will also be on your State's medical card program. Depending on the age at adoption, any special needs, and your State's policy there are various benefits that you could still receive after adoption. Such as a continued subsidy until the child is 18, the child could stay on the medical card until 18 or completion of college, some States pay for College in full to a State college. In most States, your adoption court costs are paid for.

Basically you pay for your child with stress and worry. Sometimes you get lucky and there isn't any. Sometimes you don't and there is tons of it. It all depends on that particular case.

A white child is not hard to come by. Nor are infants. Within 3 days I unexpectedly got a call for an infant, and was surprised with another one. Both newborns. Both white.  Children are available in this Country and waiting on homes everyday. Don't let anyone tell you any different. It is possible, and it happens everyday.

Good Luck on your journey.

Answer 2

Another way you can adopt is through a certified placement agency.  they work with CPS and can get you certified in 1/3 the time.  We got certified in about 6 weeks and we find out next friday on a child we may be placed with for adoption. Each state is different but I know we paid amybe $200 total for inspections, etc and we will recieve this back when we do get placement.  Of coures this is all through the foster system and you are considered a Foster/Adopt family until the adoption is finalized (6 months in TX) and you will get a monthly subsidy to defray some of the costs of a child during that time.  Sometimes depending on the child you may qualify for those benefits after finalization as well.  I know we will qualify for free college tuition for him as well, which is a HUGE help.

Answer 3

To foster or adopt an Indian child. You MUST be an enrolled Tribal member of a FEDERALLY recognized tribe. Preferably a family member as well. Placement follows this pattern.

Family

Tribe

Other Tribe.

ICWA rules dictate these things.

Answer 4

Ok, let's take one thing at a time---

Adopting through Foster Care -- Little to no expense, can take 6 months to a year to get approved.  You go through your state or county Child Protective Services agency.  You may not get to parent a child very quickly, because most of the children are placed with relatives.  And many are worked back into the home.  Some are eventually relinquished and then available to be adopted by the foster family who has been caring for them.  All ages and races of children come into care, but the more specific you are the more you may wait, depending on your agency.  But remember, that it is a huge emotional risk to fost-adopt.  Some children do go back to bio families, some of which are not rehabilitated.

Private agencies --  Adoption fees can be 10K to 40K.  You would need to get an adoption Homestudy done, then send a profile (Like a brochure with photos and a birthmother letter) to as many agencies as you can, found locally and online.   They will want to have a source of families who want to adopt an older child or toddler, so they may be interested in keeping your profile in their files.  Then they can call you if they take a child into care who meets your preferences.  Private adoption may take only a few weeks to a few years.  Put your profile and a letter out there or keep emailing agencies, and eventually one will respond.

Having one bio child may or may not hinder you.  Some birthmothers prefer it and some prefer that their child be your first.

Hope that helps!!!

Answer 5

Contact your local Department of Health and Social Services. Chances are they have a website, if not, just go in to the office. They will have handouts with all types of information. Make an appointment with a social worker, and explain your situation. There is no cost to you to make one of these appointments. They will be able to explain everything to you and give you a breakdown of cost and everything else you need to know.