What do you about this email from my maid or honor

Question

This is a email I got from my Maid of honor , after I sent her and my bride's maids that had pic's of dresses for them and me. here's what i got back. I'm so stressed Help!!!!!

We Need To Talk... im NOT NOT NOT doing this all by E-Mail, I want to be there and You want me there,? then Make a day for us to get together, take it off work and stick to it . Cuz Im not a computer bunny and if thats the only place you have the pictures then bring your laptop on down girly! The best day of your life is NOT NOT NOT supposed to be planed on a computer! And More importantly PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE remember that i work too ... and each day to ask me to take off is another day that i dont get paid for and is another day that "What I want" gets put on hold ...Im NOT NOT NOT saying that i wouldn't do this for you ...cuz i would do ANYTHING for you ...But just be easy homeslice ...i got alot on my plate right now too. so when you can, get your book or your computer or whatever and come over..... well talk have a drink and we'll bang this thing out ! I'm Super exctied

love you!!!

some more info:

I should have added the she lives an hour away and dosen't have a car. two of my brides maids live in the same town i do and one lives 12 hours away

I was email them to see if they liked any of my ideas i liked nuthings eveyr picked out yet

Answer 1

i guess everyone is different

where as i and almost evreyone i know communicates through email as its the easiest thing to do .. other people (like you friend) see it as a nuisance

she probably feels that emails arent personal and you would all get more done in face (when thats not the case at all)

me and 3other friends sorted out a whole holiday together .. where we were going, when, etc and we didnt even see or speak to each other in 3weeks (it was all done by email) so where it suits most its not the best for all

phone her and tell her that she wont be wasting time just pressing the open button on an email and then replying if she likes or dislikes the dresses and that its the fastest form of communication out there where you can see visual.

explain that not all the bride maids are able to take time off work all at the same time and are better suited to using emial as the main form of communication

well. she is your friend so you should know how she ticks.. good luck convincing her!!

Answer 2

You sound like a Bride-zilla.  If I had a friend like you, I would bail and run.  Yes, it's your day, but if you treat people like c**p, that's the kind of day you'll have.

Answer 3

Well the maid of honour is important. I agree with what the answerer before me said.. talk to her on the phone, if it's too difficult and she doesn't want to do it... get someone else. you can discuss those things on the phone and send them pictures... then an agreement should be possible without meeting in person. She is not the tailor who has to design the dresses only to look at them and say what she thinks.

Answer 4

Personally, I think she sounds odd.

I would not trouble to reply.

Answer 5

I think you should ask her if she is still able to be your maid of honor.  It doesn't really seem like she will do the things you are going to need her to do for your wedding.  It is your wedding and you need to organize your wedding the way you are able to not her.  The computer is a wonderful way to plan a wedding.  You have access to everything right in front of you.  She said that she is "NOT NOT NOT doing this all by E-mail" however then she said later "I would do ANYTHING for you".  She sounds very wishy washy.  Does she feel like she is the one that is suppose to pick out the dresses instead of you.  From the e-mail it seems like she is being very controling.  Your maids should not be making you stressed-they are suppose to make your wedding/wedding planning go easier.  

Answer 6

I think that she wants to take her role as MOH seriously and help you as much as she can in your wedding planning process.    I can see where she's NOT into all the e-mails especially if she's not computer savvy or doesn't have internet access 24/7!  

I would definetly, take a weekend and check out some bridal shops.. Get the style code and have a good time pricing and checking out dresses!  I would also try and get together with the other bridesmaids if possible and get a scedule together of try on's and fittings!  Also, have your MOH buddy-up with another bridesmaid to make transportation a little less of a burden.  So, I would see her e-mail as a good thing.  She's just wants to see/spend time with you and help you plan your special day.  However, she needs your support and understanding with her work/personal scedule.... As do the other guests in the wedding party....

Good luck

Answer 7

She is definitely right.  You shouldn't be making these decisions by E-mail.  If it is not possible for the other girls to attend, so be it.  But, at least get together with your MOH.

Answer 8

e-mail is the easy way to sort this stuff out tell her your sorry but if she cares enough she needs to stick it through and get over it. this is your day not hers. PLUS she should be planning this stuff not you!! thats what maid of honors do!!!!

Answer 9

Too many people use the computer these days to communicate and she is not one of them.  I don't blame her for being unhappy about the way you are communicating.  She's the Maid of Honor and should be by your side helping you with your big day.  She has gotten her picture across to you and if you don't agree with sitting down every time you want to plan, then bump another one up to Maid of Honor.

Answer 10

Get another maid of honor, she is making it hard for you and like you said she lives far away and doesn't want to take time off work,you are working to it's difficult trying to arrange things yourself. it's hard enough arranging a wedding without all the worry. cant you talk on the phone?have a look on line for dresses. best of luck and have a nice wedding day

Answer 11

Sometimes emails can sound much worse than how they were meant!

Please call her by phone, as she is desperately asking of you, and explain what you just did here...that they were pictures of dresses for a vote and nothing has been decided.  Maybe you should take a weekend day, grab your two bridesmaids that are in town with you, and head to the friend who is NOT a computer geek!  She sounds excited...just not able to deal with time off and stress!  

Ask her, straight out, if she TRULY wants to be in the wedding!  Don't do it rudely...maybe she's nervous of that!

If she is a good friend, it's worth the extra work!  I was just in my friend's wedding...two of us were over 20 hours away...and we did it!  We did go to bridal shops to actually see some of the styles.  Maybe that would help her...send her the code number of the dress and the maker...she can go to a bridal shop and THEY can pull it up on computer!

Don't give up on a good friend!  Don't jump to conclusions!

Good luck...in a few months, and for years, you'll look back at this as a funny memory!  

Remember, NO wedding goes smoothly.

So enjoy the bumps and put them down as memories!

Answer 12

Are you e mailing every dress/shoes/cake/meal plan etc that takes your eye?

Sound like she thinks you have wedding fever and is trying to nicely tell you to calm down a bit.

Have a good look at what you've been doing, she may be right.

Brides to be do have a tendency to get carried away.