What do you call your mil/fil?

Question

Do you (or are you) going to call your mother-in-law and father-in-law "mom and dad" or are you going to call them by their first names? Have you talked to them about it?

My parents would like for my fiance to call them mom and dad but I know that I wouldn't feel comfortable calling his parents that so I'm just wondering what other people do!

Answer 1

Yeah - I have the same problem.  I got married 5 months ago and we have all had this discussion.  My parents both call their parents-in-law mother and father or mum and dad... but my hubby's parents call their parents-in-law by their first names - and I have always called them by their first name.  It feels weird to call them mum and dad (even though I want to) because they are not used to it!  And I guess my hubby doesn't call my parents anything - and certainly (because of his family 'history') he doesn't feel comfortable calling them mum and dad.  I will slowly try to get used to calling them mum and dad and hopefully my hubby will get used to calling my parents mum and dad.  I was always taught that names like that are special and it means more that just calling someone by their first name.  (Ie, my great aunt didn't like being called 'aunt' until she was in her 80s - and then she suddenly realised that it was nice to be called aunt - because it meant she had a special relationship with us, it wasn't just some random person that calls you by your first name)

Answer 2

Well, our situation is a bit different as MIL is in Europe! (Yes, I sure wish she were here!)

When I refer to her here, it's as Mom. However, in her presence, it's using a Ukrainian term which shows respect to her as the wife of a priest.

My four married siblings all called their inlaws Mom and Dad - all are very close to them. Never bothered my parents at all...

Maybe in time, you will feel close enough.

My husband called my mom Mom, and always said he was honoured to have two moms. They were very close (she passed away).

Answer 3

I haven't talked to my in-laws about it, but I just call them by their first names.