What do you do during a tantrum in public?

Question

Hi, just a question out of interest , I met some family at a garden centre with my 22 month old daughter today, she threw a tantrum because I said 'no' she couldnt have something, she threw herself on the floor screaming and kicking. Now I always just go round the corner (so I can see her but she cant see me ) and wait it out, as after a couple of minutes of no attention she usually stops and looks for me and gives me a kiss to say sorry, but it amazes me the amount of people who stared and actually tutted !!!!

So just wondered what you all do when your little one has a tantrum in public ? thanks

Answer 1

I think if you can truly ignore the stares from others then ignoring it is the way to go.  I applaud you for being able to do it.  I personally can't handle the looks so I remove my son from the situation.  

Answer 2

I never force strangers to listen to hysterics, it is rude.  I take my children to the car and leave.  Timeout at home.  Then they cannot go someplace "special" with Mommy for a few days.  It rarely happens twice.    

Answer 3

I either ignore it or just leave. if I know my kid is really tired then they tend to melt down about EVERYTHING so I have left on those occasions.

Answer 4

As a counselor, and parent of a toddler, I have experience in dealing with tantrums.  What you did is ok.  As long as she isn't hurting herself or anyone else or destroying property, your options are to wait it out or hold her until she calms down or take her and leave.  It takes patience and persistence to deal with a tantrum and not everyone understands or has this.  I don't see anything wrong with what you did.

Answer 5

Honestly none of my kids ever did this. I always used creative techniques to prevent tantrums. Most tantrums can be avoided and I don't mean by giving in either.

If my child ever did that in the store I would take them to the restroom so they weren't disturbing anyone and I would tell them we were going to sit there until they were done. I would alson say "you have two choices, we can sit in here and do nothing and be sad, or we can be happy and finish shopping now, either way you aren't getting the toy" I would stay there until the child made the choice to continue without issue. Kids have to know you mean what you say.

Today I saw a lady give her daughter about 5 threats and still she never did anything. She klept saying "do I have to come over there and get you?" about 4 times then she said "ok I'll take your gameboy away" Still the child did not listen and the mother did nothing. It's no wonder.  

Answer 6

We pick the child up and leave.

Never, ever go around the corner where she cannot see you.  That is giving her the message that you are leaving her.  A tantrum is what happens when you combine frustration/hunger/fatigue with an immature neurological system.  When you leave, you are abandoning the child.  

I'm not surprised people stared and tutted.  The child was, as far as they could tell, abandoned.

Answer 7

you did the right thing ..ignore it . I have stepped right over my kids tantruming out and continued to shop..they stop crying and spring to their feet "where you going?"..Mama dont play dat game

Answer 8

Hi -

I was lucky that mine didn't throw many tantrums and none in public, thankfully.  I did the "step over" the child and carry on my business which completely deflated the tantrum-er.  But, you can't really do that in public as easily.   If possible, I would ignore the child and look away....probably not walk away.  If the child is in danger of getting hurt or is in the way of others, I would carry them probably to the car where I would then ignore them.  I have seen children having tantrums in public and sorry to say I have pointed them out to my children when they were young so that they could see what they would look like if they tried that.   Your daughter is still pretty young so that might not work for her.  But, when watching such a scene, I would never "tutt"......although I may be tempted if the parent was shouting at them to stop, loosing control, making empty threats or God-forbid, giving them what they wanted!!!   Any parent could find themselves in such a situation so shouldn't be judgemental.  You don't know if this child is just having a really bad moment or if this is their normal behavior.  Sounds like you handle tantrums wisely.....she'll probably give up soon!!  GOOD LUCK!

Answer 9

I will either go outside, to the bathroom or just leave. I will tell her why we are outside/in the bathroom or why we left. I think that you are doing a good job, she doesnt need to learn that it is ok to throw tantrums! Good job mom

Answer 10

I'm an uncle of 2,

I usually yell at them even louder than their tantrum, and it just throws them right off. They listen just perfectly fine after that. I've never bothered to see what anyone else in the supermarket is doing yet alone staring at me or not. Seems to work just fine

Answer 11

I tell them "If you act like this, we're leaving."  If they continue to throw the fit, I remove them.  I actually walked away from an entire buggy of groceries once because my daughter decided to throw a fit.  Since we are often a place she wants to go, the next time we go back she is better.  That's just what I do.