What do you do when you're new in a town...?

Question

...and you don't have anyone to hang out with? I'm not the kind of person who'd go to clubs etc. to meet people, I like going for walks instead, or just to the mall. Is it ok to go for walks alone or would I look weird?

There's a little trail near my apartment, but to get there I have to cross a really busy road. and I'm always worried (paranoid?) that people from the cars passing by will look at me :D

Answer 1

People in passing cars tend to look at you if you're on the side of the road, yeah, but it's no big deal. I think most of the people I see walking around places are alone, or with a dog, or something. Groups of people tend to stay in one place or take a car to get somewhere. It's pleasant to get out and go on walks by yourself, though, and I would say that's a great idea. Maybe you'll meet other people who like walking, and you guys can hang out. Otherwise, I would suggest joining some group or club at the community center, a local church, or school or work if either of those apply, in order to meet people with similar interests.

Answer 2

Hi,

Please don't get a dog just because you want to meet people. Dogs are a lot of hard work, and that wouldn't be fair to the dog.

Don't worry about walking across the street alone. I think it's a good idea to regularly go on walks around your neighborhood. If you see a neighbor outside, approach and say hi, tell them you're new in town. Do you work? Your job is another good way to meet people. Do you go to school? Organized school activities like sports or drama or clubs are the best way to meet people with similar interests.

When I first moved to Rio, I went everywhere alone, the store, movies, parks, and if I even smiled at someone or made a small remark about something around us, usually it started up a conversation. Don't be shy! And don't be embarrassed being alone sometimes. It's easier for potential friends to approach you if you are alone!

There is a good friend there who you will bump into for the first time one of these days. Just go look for them!

Answer 3

Just have a warm smile, kind heart, generous look, and a friendly personality when you meet new people.

You may start off by working somewhere where you'll be able to meet alot of new people or even a small "hi, how are you doing?" would be great when you bump into someone your way.

The most important thing is for people to have the very first impression of you as a friendly and nice person and the rest will fall in place.

Hope this helps

Answer 4

I moved to a new town about 3 years ago.  I went for long walks, all by myself.  I walked around the town, learning the names of the streets and the decorations in the yards, etc.  I went into the restaurant (there's only one, here) all by myself many times.  I smiled, chatted with the waitresses, other customers.  I joined a ceramics class, made friends there and learned a lot about my new little town.

I also walked into a church, smiled, stuck out my hand to everyone who greeted me.  Felt a bit weird the first time, by myself, but gradually I felt at home there.  Made several more friends there. Soon found myself doing volunteer things there.  I work with the kids, in some of the programs they have.  I also teach Sunday School there quite often.

I have lots of friends here now, and continually discover new things about my town, ways of amusing myself or getting along. More and more things to do.

Maybe you feel weird doing things by yourself.  But it isn't really a big deal to others.  It really isn't.  They see someone who's by herself, and then go on with their own lives. Their don't think it's weird at all.  They may even give you an encouraging smile.  If you speak up a bit, start conversations, you will soon have friends.

Answer 5

How are people going to get to know you without seeing you? Don't worry about looking weird. Everybody's weird to somebody, so that's inevitable and certainly not worthy of centering your life around. Just get out there and do what's right for you.

I'm not a club person, either. When I'm in a new town, volunteer work has been a great way for me to get to know new people.

Answer 6

Even if you are alone, start to eat out a few times a week, hang out at a bar once in a while and start reading your books and surfing the internet at coffee shops or librarys.  This will get you seen.  Even if you speak to no one at least you can observe the community.

Sign up for activities at local community centers.  Join meetup.com and see if any groups are in your area.  

Love the idea about walking the dog!

If you are religious, get involved with your church a bit.

Join a gym and do classes there.  

Answer 7

If you like dogs then I suggest that you get one and begin taking it for walks.  A friendly dog who is well cared for will start many conversations for you.  I was given a poodle when his owner couldn't keep him any longer.  Never thought I'd own a dog that had to have fancy hairdos but he has made several neighborhood friends for me.  The adults and children are always wanting to pet him and comment on how he dances on his hind legs.  I call him my Circus Poodle.  Dogs are great company too since you are new in town and alone a lot.

Good luck.