What do you do when your mom is a alcoholic and she always lies about it, and it hurts really bad?

Question

My mom has been a alcoholic for the past 6-7 years and it hurts me really bad. Every time i've ever brought it up and told her that she needs help or she needs to stop she try's to make me look like the bad guy. What should I do?

Answer 1

The best thing, probably only thing, you can do is to educate yourself on alcoholism. This knowledge will empower you. It is a problem that is affecting your life and you need to know how to live with it. The approach you are using now will not help either of you. Get information about al-anon meeting in your town and start attending. You must learn to understand this disease, it's causes and it's effects if it's something that is going to be part of your life. Best of luck

Answer 2

Victoria you may want to take a look at either Alateen or Alanon, which are both groups for friends and family if alcoholics.  Here they can learn how to cope with the alcoholics behaviour etc, and share their experiences with others who are going through a lot of the same experiences.  You may also want to mention your concerns to your family doctor.  In addition if you have extended family then please feel free to use them when necessary.  But there is really nothing that you can do to make your mom stop drinking.  She has to do that on her own and hopefully she will hit her rock bottom soon and give up this dreaded disease.  Best of luck.

Answer 3

She's not going to get help for you - people only change for themselves. What you do is stick it out and resolve never ever to be like her. You also might want to find some people who understand like a local alateen group.

Answer 4

Tell her to either stop drinking or your going to be out of her life (if your old enough, and if your not then when you turn 18) I am so sorry your mother doesn't realize she is an alcoholic and needs help.

Answer 5

I am not a doctor so I hesitate to give advice to much on how you should handle this. But, I do know for a fact, don't be an enabler. Do not go buy her booze, do not make up excuses for what she does when drunk ...that is what enabler means. That is one of the best things that you can do for her.

Here are seven "Cs" that may be helpful for any COA to remember:

I didn't CAUSE it.

I can't CURE it.

I can't CONTROL it.

I can take CARE of myself.

I can COMMUNICATE my feelings.

I can make healthy CHOICES.

I can CELEBRATE being me.