Question:

What do you guys think? Rate on ten plz!?

by  |  earlier

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I entered the room,

grimace on my face,

sadness had entered my heart

years ago.

But she entered the room

with a smile on her face,

her face held

an unusual glow.

As more people entered

one by one

they glanced at her face

vibrant as the sun.

More and more people

who had felt just like me

exclaimed "Contagious!"

the smile began to spread

and the people felt

more and more alive.

A smile spreads

so quick, in such a blur,

that when you leave

you realize that

the smile that you had not made

in so many years

took place on your face

by that one person.

(Fun to write, based on some people's life, not mine who feel really sad)

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3 ANSWERS


  1. 2


  2. OK. I want to rate it high, it has potential, but I must rate it low. Maybe a 4. I do that because your flow and they story is amazing through the first through paragraphs. After that you go off rhythm. The flow becomes rocky. Sorry, but I would recommend that you stick with the pattern you started in the beginning.

  3. thought it was going some where but never did 6

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