What do you guys think of my i am poem ?

Question

i am determined and shy

i wonder if i'll ever acomplish all my goals

i hear the owls hooting

i see good thing ahead

i want to help the poor people

i am determined and shy

i pretend that the world is a perfect place to live

i feel like the world is looking down to poor people

i touch dont know what to put that down for that mabye you could help me

i worry if ill i finish all my future goals

i cry when i see sad movies

i am determined and shy

i understand anything is possible

i say dont know what put can you guys help me

i dream every night lol

i try to get all a's in my report card

i hope i'l be rich when i grow up

i am determined and shy

Answer 1

Is this for a school project? Like, you have to fill in the blanks... If so, this is a really bad assignment, it shouldn't be called a poem.

For the 'I touch' line, you could put 'I touch the untouchable.' Even though that sounds lame, it's better than 'I touch people's hearts or something.

Answer 2

Um...well I think you should use some metaphors or something. If the assignment is to start with the "I hear, I wonder, I see" I guess you can't really do that very well. But if you can, I strongly suggest you change it up a little bit.