Question:

What do you guys think of this prologue to the first story of a series named Kingdoms?

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Ancient Kingdoms I: Rise of the Goblins

Prologue:

After countless millennia of devastating volcanic eruptions, impacts and earthquakes, Azuka finally took shape into its modern day form and the first species began to appear. Of the many species, there was one that quickly became dominant. Those were the Azukan Goblins. They were highly intelligent and crafty. They employed Exilac, a modified species that resembles humans, as slaves. The Goblins had a peaceful kingdom on the eastern shores of Theasea, but tranquility was about to be disrupted.

In a distant kingdom near the Volkala mountains were the Lightning Sentinels. Lightning Sentinels were also a very intelligent species, but lacked numbers and ability to accurately explain unknown phenomena. They were secluded, only inhibiting a small area outside their capital of Lohnero (Thunder city). The sentinels are unique in that they live off of the electrical geography of their region. The Sentinels were never imperial; however, with the arrival of their new leader, Mekog, they began finding ways to expand their kingdom. But in order for them to live outside of Lohnero, they need the electrical energy they thrive on. They began to experiment ways of collecting the electrical energy and moving to different locations. However, this went terribly wrong.

A surge of electrical energy broke free from the sentinels control and moved around Azuka by moving with the winds. The storm eventually made its way to the outskirts of the goblin kingdom of Azuka. The storm would have wiped out the goblins but because of their high intellect, they survived the storm by moving their kingdom. Fearing that there would be more storms following this one, the goblin leader decided to move his kingdom off of the shores and onto the sea floor. The goblins were able to breathe under water because they had done extensive research of underwater breathing which allowed them to move safely to the sea floor along with their slaves.

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  1. It sounds really good and VERY detailed.  It makes a reader more interested within reading the first paragraph.

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