What do you think about a 17[almost 18] year old and an 18[almost 19] year old having a baby? Advice?

Question

My friend has been with her boyfriend for over 2 years now and she may be preggers. She's almost 18 and he's almost 19.

Neither one of them believe in abortion because its wrong.

what is some advice i could give to them?

Also, they are not upset or ashamed if she is preggers, so please don't tell me to tell them they are making a mistake!

Answer 1

I had a baby at 19, my husband was then 24. You can tell them that while having a baby is do great and at the same time so hard. They will be putting that child before anything else and it realy changes you life plans. I also think abortion is wrong, but they need to be ready to step up to the responsibilty of having a baby, you no longer get to think about what you want its all about them. Good luck to them..

Answer 2

im 18 and pregnant to my boyfriend of over two years. hes 28 and we live in the home he owns. i would recommend she continues with education (its possible! im doing my first year of university study) and that her boyfriend has a good paying job or they have some source of stable income. (my boyfriend owns a business) i think they will need to have their own place to live, family support from both sides and a good doctor.

let her know that her life isnt over, she just has to re-think her priorities and put her plans for the future on hold for a while.

Answer 3

You don't have to tell them that they are making a mistake, they will figure it out without anyone telling them.  There is no advice that you can give them.  If she is pregnant then she will need medical advice and a lot of it.  If she isn't pregnant then you can tell them to get on a very reliable birth control and think about what they want for their future. Once you have a baby you greatly limit your options.  If you can't help them then at least help yourself and avoid pregnancy as a teenager

Answer 4

First they really need to go to a doctor to find out for sure. even if they do a home test (iv had a false positive on a home test before) then start making plans.

break the news to any parents.

buy the books "what to expect when your expecting"and  "I refuse to raise a brat".

sit down with one another and go into detail exactly what to expect from one another (if ether will still be going to college, who is gonna work and who will watch the baby).

talk about parenting down to the last detail

and finally expect that times are gonna get hard there relationship may or maynot be able to live through it.

when I had my daughter her father and myself had a very hard time and split up for a few years but after we got alot of things sorted out we got back together then married. most of the fighting didnt start till after she was born and had to do with not talking about things enough before she was born.

Answer 5

make sure they have a good support system!...family, friends, church, etc., anyone who could be caring and helpful!!!!!!! I was much older when I had my first....(single mother)...sooooo much harder without a good support system!!!!!

Answer 6

I think its fine because me and hubby(b/f at the time) were the same exact age as your friend when we got pregnant with our first baby and was also together nearly 2 yrs. We also are 100% against abortion,and wanted babies...thus the 2 daughters and third baby on the way now...almost 7 yrs together and still wanting more after this baby.

Just let them know that it is hard to raise a baby at a young age,but NOT impossible! If they do not have jobs then at least one of them need to start looking for employment of some kind because a baby is not cheap either! Since they are so young it might be in good favor to look into medicaid for insurance so she can go to prenatal appointments and have the baby with little or no cost to her.

For advice I would just say it does get hard,but if they love eachother and are mature enough to handle a baby's needs before their own then they will make it just fine with a baby!

Answer 7

Hi well I think you should give them a lot of support, theyre gonna need it!!! I'm a mom at seventeen and my bf is seventeen too and the best thing to do is be there for your friends, if she is pregnant she is gonna go through a lot of mood swings and shes gonna be hungry all the time and take her out to eat, go shopping for things for the baby, throw her a baby shower or something. If she is pregnant no one can change that so you just need to move forward and tell them to make goals for their NEW LIFE and just really also being there for her after the baby is born because it is really tiring to take care of a newborn so good luck!! and tell them congradulations!!! (if she is pregnant) =D

Answer 8

if she is already pregnant, well then its done. they have to think about if they can be good parents and provide well for the baby. If they can't, adoption is often a good choice.

if they aren't pregnant, I can't recommend it at that age. parenting is the hardest thing in the world. it takes money and maturity. they should grow up first

Answer 9

they are making a mistake.

they are too young, probably don't have good jobs, and i doubt will be together for very long. i feel bad for the kid they will be bringing into this world.