What do you think about this poem, don't worry, it's not that long!?

Question

Love. Some people swear it's the most wonderful word in the dictionary.

I know how to make it even more wonderful....add an "in" in front.

In Love

Few people are ever "in love" if that's even possible. Perhaps love is only a figure of speech, an incredible illusion.

What's wrong...what happened between us?

I don't know, I don't know, I don't know...but something did.

Just tell me what's wrong and put me out of this misery.

Well...You're just not the same girl I fell in love with...something's changed about you.

THE ONLY REASON I'VE CHANGED IS BECAUSE YOU'VE HURT ME SO MUCH!!!

Pain changes people.

Makes them only a remnant of their former selves....the walking dead, if you will.

And they wish for death. Every night.

They don't want to wake up.

They don't want a hug.

They don't want their favorite dinners.

All they ask for is the end that will never come.

Answer 1

I think that it would work beautiful as a theatrical piece, but revise it think of every line that would fit into this poem then chose the lines that best discribe your emotions. I think that you went a lot of places with this poem, and in my opinion I think that you are subconciously holding back, in seems like some parts are very spicific, and some times you are holding back. My advice is to figure out how you feel then rewrite this piece.

I am sorry if I have offened you but only you know how you feel soyou don't have to follow my advice.  

Answer 2

You sound depressed.

Get yourself out there and find someone who makes you want to write a poem about how NICE it is to be in love.

Don't wish for death.

Wish for someone new.

It is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all.

You loved and lost. It is a part of life, and the pain is beautiful in its own way. It sounds like you are drowning in it now. It's time for it to end though. Loving and losing is a cycle.

It's time for that cycle to start over again.

Good luck!

Remember, every moment is a new beginning. Go to bed thinking of how tomorrow is a totally new day. Make it the best one ever.  

Answer 3

i liked it

Answer 4

*BRAVO*

Answer 5

its more philisophical than poetic... i like it