What do you think about us TTC and also putting our names on the adoption list?

Question

You see my husband and I are TTC for four years and nothing. But we were thinking of putting our names on an adoption list and also letting nature take its course. I would love to have an adopted one and one of my own. Even if there were about the same age. I work in a day care so I know how to care for many at a time and love it.

Answer 1

I think that's ok.  I have a friend that was having a hard time carrying a baby to term and she had 4 miscarriages so they adopted a little boy from Russia and when he was 8 months old they found out they were pregnant and nine months later they had a little girl.  And they are soooo very happy that they were able to give a little boy a happy home and also a little sister.

Good luck!

Answer 2

I think that "artificial twinning" is a bigger deal than most people think.  Having a bio and adopted child very close in age carries with it a lot of very real issues, and I suggest you research it thoroughly before you consider letting it become a possibility.  It is not the same as taking care of babies in a daycare.  With the children in the daycare you are their secondary caretaker.  You are not their mother, the center of their world, the one they need to have the incredibly important attachment time with, as you would be with your own children, biological and adopted.  (By the way, your adopted child would be "your own" as much as your biological child would be.  If you are considering becoming an adoptive parent, please use adoption respectful language.)  Adopted children have special attachment needs, and it isn't right or fair to neglect a very young biological child to meet those needs, nor would it be fair to an adopted child not to be able to have the extra attention he or she would need.  Some agencies actually require adoptive parents to use contraception during the adoption process,(although I don't know how they would enforce that.)

Answer 3

I think adoption places assume that you are certainly going to continue to have unprotected s*x while you are in the process of adopting. When I was going through infertility treatments for the last of several times, I had already started the adoption process rolling because it was the only way I could emotionally deal with it. I knew I needed to know that adoption was possible before I could go through the treatment but, I didn't want to abandon the possibility without one last try. The adoption place did not know about this and it was not supposed to allow it.

However, this is very different from simply proceeding with your s*x life and seeing what happens even while you go through the adoption process.

Answer 4

Ummm.. I think that is a good idea why didn't I think of that sooner... Yeah I definetly would... It took me 7 years to get a son and he is three now.. We decided if we wanted anymore we would adopt.. So anyway i would get your paperwork done and get the ball rolling for adoption...