What do you think causes perfectionism in a person?

Question

Could it come from abuse and being controlled and humiliated if you get something wrong (like being called and made to feel "stupid")?

What are some of the causes? Any guesses?

Answer 1

I would say yes. My husband went through a very rough childhood, and he is a perfectionist. He is getting accustomed to me and things are doing better but I use to hate how he wanted everything so perfect and I didn't. I believe that his rough background made him this way.

Answer 2

i think the idea you give makes a lot of sense. a childhood full of high expectations and harsh responses to mistakes, to my mind, makes sense as the root of perfectionist behaviour. the expectations and reaction to failure would then be passed on to the child in question = perfectionism.

i now realise that it more than makes sense, this is a theory that would fit with some people i've met who are perfectionist.

Answer 3

Yes it could be the cause,I know my husband was treated that way by his parents and it has had a profound outcome on his behaviours! eg: Everything has to be just so,the whole family is expected to agree because he always feels right about things..he knows and nobody else can do the job.But I dont think that is the only reason that causes this,I think it's a reverse superiority complex,they feel they may not be able to achieve something,so they go out of their way to prove to others(and themselves) that they can! I myself have a lifelong fixation with correct English spelling and grammar,because as a child I skipped a couple of grades and the teacher didn't want me in her class.She deliberately failed me on a spelling test,which I knew I had answered correctly.Long story but my mother ended up at school demanding the Principal give me a rapid fire spelling test in her presence.I passed totally,but it has stuck with me to this day!The spell check on the side of this is telling me now I've made spelling errors,but I'm arguing with it,because as I said..I'm using ENGLISH not American spelling,lol! So it may be different experiences for different people,but those put downs we get as a child,stay with us for sure! As a teacher I always try to say something positive,even when childre "act up",reason being they may not remember my name,face..but they very well could remember my words! Hope this has heloed a little!

Cheers,

Glee. :)

Answer 4

Perfectionism comes from those concerns you listed and also about the "expectation" of others.  These folks tend to feel that they must perform all the time and eventually become self-centered, cold, and numb about life in general(or what really matters).

Answer 5

i think its becase of pressure someone feels or they might feel inferior

one of my friends gets grounded if he gets a B until he brings it back up to an A