What do you think of my haiku?

Question

Death is but an end

Birth is just the beginning

Life comes in between

There it is. What do you think?

Answer 1

I like!

Answer 2

I like your Haiku. you should make more.  

Answer 3

i like it but i think its a little obvious/blunt. i know haikus are difficult to write but maybe try and make it a little more mysterious or something

Answer 4

i think its kinda stupid

people know birth is the beginning

death is the end

and life is not always between the beginning and end

Answer 5

Sometimes writing just to write and practice is just the thing to get your muse going again.  Traditional Haiku, unlike other poetry, doesn't use capital letters at the beginning of the lines; the original Japanese didn't have capital letters.  Also, besides the syllable count, the first two lines should create a single image and the last line should produce a parallel image that acts like a punch line of sorts.  Yes, your Haiku is a bit obvious, but being obvious is not a crime.  However, a Haiku should create a juxtaposition of images that make you think about how the two images work together.  Your Haiku doesn't do that.  It's not a bad practice piece for syllable work, but if you want to write better Haiku, even if you're not going to do traditional Haiku with season words, etc., you need to start practicing parallel image creation.  The more you read, the more you'll understand, but all in all your Haiku surely gave you some practice in the form.

...Keep writing, regardless of the form

Answer 6

That was good. I'm sure you're a talented poet, and I kind of see where you're going with this haiku.

However, I personally think the words are a bit too obvious. It's basically presenting the circle of life. You should try to add more descriptions. Be mysterious, attract your readers' attentions.

To sum things up, just don't go straight to the point, because that leaves readers finishing early and not really feeling anything. Be vague. Pull your readers in.

Have fun. =D

Answer 7

it's cool, i have heard of death is an end all the time