What do you think of my poem:Divorce?

Question

divorse

cant you feel me crying

cant you see the blue sky

why me?

cant you set me free

cauz' i became so numb

i'm livin' in fright

i became so tierd

so mad that you lied

cauz' every thing i thought we would be.. is falling apart right in front of yoooooou

i'm just out of control

i cant be your cool

you're just killing my soul

i want divorce

Answer 1

nice........

I dont think we should continue on how its going

I just cant deal with this anymore and i know its showing

Why did this have to happen to me

I cant do it anymore

i just want to be free

now that the feelings had been torn

But i want you to continue

on your ongoing course

and  the paper's are on the table

I'm filing a divorce

srry i just had too

but yours it good

i just luv writing poetry

srry

Answer 2

This poem is very good

it sends out a message about divorce.

The first two lines are about not showing

of feelings along with the inability of seeing the

blue sky

Going through

You are asking why me

Cant you set me free

This is talking about one person who either doesn't want a divorce or the other person torchering  the other one

This is causing a lot of stress

because feeling numb

being frightened

its draining you out

leaving you tired

You are angry because of the lies

The life you looked for is coming apart at the seams.

Answer 3

Not so good.

Answer 4

I don't know. Its a good start. I think if you made it rhyme it would flow better. Try again... Just my opinion

Answer 5

sounds harsh.