What do you think of my poem?its a bit allegorical...?

Question

I almost kinda think

I can hold the world myself

only then to realize

it sits upon a shelf

a shelf of infinite size

A shelf that is brand new

to keep us with the lives of others

whove tried to lift it too.

And occasionally

When i get too dark

and my flower doesnt bud

ill steal someone elses heart

to pump someone elses blood

and if that persons trash,

then of course thier bloods my treasure

so why be born to please?

to be pleased is a pleasure.

when i look into my heart

to find some veins and cells

who are most unaware

that they are little apt to tell

that if i looked into my soul

i just might find a lore

that lore is a hole

its the circle that you bore

the circle you bore through me

with passion in your eyes

with your hate and your despise

perhaps thats your demise

when i become too wise

wiser than an owl

who sits alone at dark

who doesnt waste his body

by giving it a heart

Answer 1

I really like the concept and the third and last stanzas are my favorite.  This poem has a definite beat, and I think that in the 5th stanza the beat gets...interrupted?  It was just a little hard to get back into it.  I also like the format.  It's kinda like that thing on Barney, "Green Grass Grows All Around".  You know, where there's a tree, on the tree is a hole, in the hole is a bird, et cetera.  You're poem has that feeling, like you're going deeper and deeper into something.

Answer 2

WOW....its fabulous....i really love it. my fav parts are  the 3rd and 4th stanzas...but i also like the 1st  two ^_^ its wonderful. your very talented

Answer 3

That is the one of the best poem and it's getting better than ever. On the first verse, you're noticing what you're doing so far. The second verse, you're saying that life goes on no matter and there's a new born around us all the time. The third verse, it happens often. The fourth verse, you want to take care of everything of an important single life form. The fifth verse, when you find something useless to other you'd find something useful to you. The sixth verse, you're trying to find the missing piece that's a part of you. The seventh verse, it's what you're interests you that make you who you are. The eighth verse, you're a person who spends his life with great things without damaging your body or hating your own body. Well, I hope I explained everything perfectly about you poem because I can really understand what you're saying as all.