What do you think of my poetry?? ?

Question

New beginning

I can see a lot of doors

But I can't find the one

That will make my heart shine

One more time

All I can see is black and white

And emptiness is all around

But still I know I'm going to find the light

One more time

The sadness of my heart

Won't die until I find the light

One more time

I still have my hope

I still have my faith

And I guess it's enough for me

I have to believe

That I have no luck

No one

In this huge world

Time is passing

And I have to start a new beginning

Cause yesterday was over

And tomorrow may never come

So I have to live my life today

I'm not going to wait

I'm not going to waste another moment

This will be my new beginning

Finally I found the light

That will shine my heart

One more time

so...what do you think??

Answer 1

its great sara barielles sucks, so you'll be even better. get that copyrighted b4 some1 on Y!A takes it!

Answer 2

Its not funny, try this

I can see a lot of doors

But I can't find the one

The one to make my poor heart shine

I guess I drank far tooo much wiine

All I can see is black and white

the orange glow of the street light

And emptiness is all around

then the right door at last I found.

I crawl unsteady up the stairs

In bed I find I your sleeping there,

I climb beside you we make love

Angel choirs sing from above.

With morning comes an awful shock

Strange sounds from the  alarm clock

And different curtains, diffent lights

Its the wrong house I realise.

You lie grinning like a cheshire Cat

my god I slept with some old bat

And fleeing from the house I own

In future I'll stick to Newcastle Brown

Answer 3

I agree, they sound like song lyrics.

Beautiful, good job

Answer 4

Wow. That is AMAZING. You should definitely put some music to that (I recommend musicshake) and you could become the next Sara Bareillies. :)

Answer 5

Wow...that made my eyes water. Very mysterious.