What do you think of my short poem? (8 lines)?

Question

You are the sweet scent of flowers,

The essence of the spring

I’m an old and empty vase,

Dreaming of the joy you bring,

Whenever you smile at me

Under the vernal rain

You water my thirsty tree

And I forget all pain

Answer 1

It's really nice..no doubt

Answer 2

i like it, the only line i'm not sure of is "you water my thirsty tree", it just sounds a little odd somehow, but i still like it. nice imagery, its a summery little tuneful poem.

Answer 3

"Hi!"

Thats a beautiful poem.

Cherrs. : )

Answer 4

Its so important that a strong message is and has been given~~

Answer 5

awwwwwwwww, that sounds so romantic

I think it is asolutely lovely and you must be a great poet with great inspiration somewhere ^_^

Answer 6

It doesn't matter if it's short, the words are full of feeling, the metaphors are wonderful, the description is fabulous, everything is absolutely PERFECT! DON'T CHANGE ANYTHING!!!... unless you want to... but I wouldn't, if I were you. That's one of the best rhymes I've ever seen, I can't rhyme without it sounding really... dreadful. Keep up the good work!

Answer 7

Very good attempt.Keep it up.

Answer 8

great word usage. it was wonderful... and it was right as a short poem in longer wouldve lost the power

Answer 9

Not bad.

I could put it to music.