What do you think of my super emo poem? haha

Question

“In This World”

the broken soul,

the shattered one;

Lives his life alone

without ambition.

Pretending to be ignored;

Feeling neglected

from love,

Yet

Over whelmed,

with interrogation.

He hides behind his past.

Forgetting to remember

there is a future.

An abandoned

Child;

Left alone without the

last precious breath

Of air;

Vital to his existence.

Chained by all

the pain inside,

forced to continue living.

I usually don't ever write emo poems, but to get my feelings out sometimes I have to. I am a happy person, trust me. I smile a lot, I laugh a lot, it's just the emotions coming out of certain situations. =D

Honesty is recommended. Please?

I'm positive I'm not the BEST author or poem writer/composer, but I would like to think I'm pretty good.... so what do you think?

Answer 1

I for one enjoyed it ! Maybe you should think about taking a class or two.Looks like you may do very well.

Answer 2

It's not emo it's just your feelings! Don't label yourself and your writing!

It's good

Peace

Answer 3

I just want to say how much I hate the word emo

how much I hate how often it's used

how much I hate how popular it is

how much I hate the whole idea

how much I hate what a cop out it is

how much I hate the dress

how much I hate the hair

how much I hate thinking about it

uuugggghh

yea the poems great

Answer 4

Pretty good, except for the part where you virtually apologize for merely writing a poem. Does it matter what emotions a poem convey?

I think your poem reflects an interesting perspective. You were also able to describe the subject feelings in a rather creditable manner. Every emotion is in all of us...

Peace.

Answer 5

its just a bunch of words put together to look dramatic...but i guess its okay :D . whats important is that you let it out, if you want to be good at it, try widening your vocabulary and express your "emo-ness" more creatively. when i write my poems I'm usually in an over-emotional state, but that's just me :). I'm sure you'll find your own way to be creative. theirs a reason why usually emo people write poems that are so extraordinarily impressive, its because they cut deep and that the  metaphors and figures off speech are so perfectly used. all it takes is imagination. so...this poem is okay if you were able to let out whatever you feel in a healthy way :). but if you want me to answer creative-wise, its not that colorful, i know what you tried to do and you weren't able to pull it off. you were trying the "little words but deep meanings", the structure is obvious. hope i helped.

Answer 6

It's very nice!! I personally love it!! Good Job :D

Answer 7

This is actually really good I liked it! but I wouldnt necessarily call it emo. :/  

Answer 8

Very nice! =) Amazing work.

Do you like mine?

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