What do you think of the opening of my long ballad? (or maybe Epic)?

Question

I

Beneath the drowsy eyes of mount Vael

Sitting astride the rushing wasters of Dron

Lies Quinto, a city of strength and pride

With her massive walls of marbled stone

Standing firm, like mountains made by man

Casting their grim shadows across the plain

A plain bearing scars of battles cruel

Once adorned with fields of golden grain

II

Upon the walls danced an emerald flag

Richly adorned with silver and gold

On its center a golden mace was sewn

A relic of legends long untold

A mace wielded by "the Lion" of Qùvn

The father of Quinto and her first king

And years on, his heritage still stands

A city admired by every being

III

Long has Quinto basked under the sun

But now a vicious gale is whirling strong

And Quinto's hopes are now all outrun

The sky is dark and it wouldn't be long

When her walls lay frail and her might is gone

And her lovely princess, so fair and young

Is to be strayed in the dying city

That will have neither mercy nor pity

(To be continued…)

Answer 1

Some of the rhythm of off, but good as always!

My revised edition:

I

Beneath the drowsy eyes of mount Vael

Sitting astride the rushing waters of Dron

Lies Quinto, a city of strength and pride

With her massive walls of marbled stone.

Standing like mountains made by men,

Casting grim shadows across the plain

A plain bearing scars of battles cruel

Once adorned with golden grain

II

Upon the walls dances an emerald flag

Richly adorned with silver and gold

On its center a golden mace is sewn

A relic of legends long untold.

A mace wielded by "the Lion" of Qùvn

The father of Quinto and her first king

And years on, his heritage still stands

A city admired by every being

III

Long has Quinto basked under the sun

But now a gale is whipping strong

And Quinto's hopes are all outrun

The sky is dark and it wouldn't be long

When her walls lay frail and her lovely princess

Is to be astray in the dying city

The walls crumbling to dust, crumbling to dirt

In the merciless town without pity.