What do you think of this love poem??

Question

you are so addicting it destroys me

you are so beautiful its sickening

I love you so much its terrifying

Like a drug this love you induce me with

I like to be on it for as long as Im able to feel

For real ill never let you deal this one

Answer 1

I really like it. It's powerful and I believe you have said much in that 6 lines.

plz answer my question on a poem

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;...

Answer 2

The first line needs to be

You are so addictive it destroys me (there is no such word as 'addicting'

I'd like to be on it for as long as I'm able to feel

For real, I'll never let you deal this one.

(Good try - but, next time just pause before posting, and go back later to see how you can improve)

Edit - Sorry, I mistook you for some-one who wanted help and advise.  

What do I think of your love poem?  I think it needs editing and more care taken with it to do it justice.

Answer 3

I don't think it is that great but I would love it if my husband was the one who wrote it.

Is it yours?

Answer 4

it ok ,

not bad... for a love note to YOUR loved one is good : ) .. make sure to use a rose : ) .. or an orchard . ;b

Answer 5

I'm sorry - but beautiful and sickening - in the same sentence - is too much of a conflict - for me to handle.  Couldn't you think of another word? Suggestion: How 'bout changing L2 & 3 - switch the words "sickening" and "terrifying" - see what you think ♥

Answer 6

It's a love poem.  It's okay.  Only comment I would make is that the apostrophe is your friend.