What do you think of this poem? Critism welcome?

Question

It's for an exam, the theme is depression

The poem:

How can I explain the way I am feeling

The unbearable pain

Like the peeling

of skin from bone

And I hear angry voices everywhere

Yet, I am alone

And those angry voices

Well, they are my own

Telling me how much of a failure I am

To everyone I know

Especially my fam-ily

i-l-y

I love you

But they don't

And I can't

And it will never be the way it was

Before this pain engulfed me

The evil death, chasing

I try to flee

But it flows through my veins

The only way to release it

By the slashing of my skin

And as I watch I see the evil

Emerge from within

The sight of my own blood

Falling to the floor

Makes me beg, yearn for more

And the longer I let it flow

The more I see,The more I know

That this evil is gone, That is,

Until tommorrow

When the searing emotions reappear

Haunting, Hunting, Hating

Waiting for me to give in

Patiently waiting

Answer 1

i really liked it... think u have captured many correct emotions!

good luck!

Answer 2

It's very revealing and graphic but more than that it sounds like a cry for help.  I suggest you talk to a professional or at least someone older with some life expierience first.  Keep writing, it is a great way to get your feelings out.  Good Luck

Answer 3

well that was deep. Youve described how alot of people feel inside, yea i liked it xx

Answer 4

sounds like Eminem rapping... lol

Answer 5

i think that is good!

Answer 6

Whoa, that's dark!  Good imagery, kinda creepy and raw, but I think it's good.

Answer 7

Cool man.