What do you think of this poem? How can I improve my writing?

Question

You are sick of the way I treated you

You got pissed because I don’t have time

And your right

That is why

now its over

Though we could be friends

Hang out on the weekends

But you suddenly don’t care

Which is totally fair

With what a ***** I was to you

Now that ***** realizes that her feelings grew

It doesn’t matter now cause,

Its over.

I wanted to be friends

Maybe hang out on the weekends

But I guess you don’t

Although I cant read your mind

That is what I think

Its just over.

I miss your texts

I miss that smirk

I miss your blondeness

I miss the inside jokes

I miss the flirts

I just really miss

All of this

But now

its over

Answer 1

ya should ya less vulgar words mate...express those words in a different way  

Answer 2

Although I could tell you meant something powerful in this poem, the way the words were presented made it hard for me to read it with a rhythm. I know what you're trying to say and all, but some of it is a bit misplaced.

Though how you twisted the "friends" and "weekends" thing the second time though...that was clever. That could even be used in a song, though like I said, a little rephrasing would be needed.

You're a wonderful writer nevertheless; keep it up.

Answer 3

Same old teen angst poem. It's nothing spectacular. It's not poetic. Anyone can ramble how they feel into different lines. It doesn't necessarily make it poetry.