What do you think of this poem i wrote..?

Question

x*x Goodbye x*x

An angel came to save my day

I never knew I could happen this day

I sat alone in misery and despair

Til you came and wiped my tears away

I wish I could keep you to myself

But I already knew you belonged somewhere

Here’s a rose I want you to keep

It’ll remind you of me

Through all you’re days

I know it’s time to say our goodbyes

You gave me a kiss

A kiss of a reminder

A reminder that tells me

How sweet you are

Here’s my goodbye

I know it’s time to go

But my hearts tells me

We’ll meet someday

You’re an angel who saves my days.

Answer 1

Don't quit you day job.

Answer 2

It's really good and i love how you expressed yourself through poetry.

Answer 3

i lyk it =]

Answer 4

I think it is very nice.I like it..You have a way with words.A bit sad.

Answer 5

i like it too

its really good

Answer 6

An angel came to save my day

I never knew I could happen this day

Having the word day on both sentences kind of disrupts the flow

I think it has a good message but alot of it is a bit too simple

I would take the words even deeper than they are

Answer 7

I like it. It's very cute.

I would work on the wording in your future poems though. Work on making it sound a bit more dramatic.

Like maybe taking the last part of your poem and doing something like this:

The hour has come to bid you farewell

Sadly, it is time to come to part

But my heart keeps telling me

We shall meet again

For you are the angel that saves my day

I know you make think some of the wording is not necessary, but it does make it more dramatic. You see what I mean?

Don't change your poem, I like it how it is, but remember to revise for future poems!

Good luck with your writing!

Answer 8

I don't think its particularly thought provoking or philosophical...It doesn't use the language very well, and is predictable... Sorry...

Answer 9

This is beautiful! I really enjoyed reading this poem, you should enter it in a competition. Maybe you could write a kind of sequel to it!