What do you think of this poem to my husband?

Question

I've never claimed to be a great writer, but what do you think of this poem?

If my love were money,

you’d be a millionaire.

Fancy things and shiny things,

I’d give without a care.

If my love were pebbles,

I could build a skyscraper.

I’d stack the rocks so big and tall,

it would never fall.

If my love were water,

you’d have the world’s oceans.

So deep, true blue, so strong and true,

just like my love for you.

On our anniversary I wrote this poem

to show how much I care.

I don’t have money, nor bricks, nor the sea,

But my love will last just as long for all eternity.

Answer 1

Just lovely. A warm and tender heart that spoken. A lucky man he is to have such a romantic woman .. Lots of wives complain of headache as a poetic closure of the romantic deal.So now many guys envy Ur man. I hope to read more of Ur poems when U get that lot of money, just to see how 'd U modify the 1st stanza. : )  

Answer 2

You wrote this poem just for your husband. The only person who has an opinion that matters is him.

I find it rather strange that you have posted it here: why are you advertising your man?

Answer 3

I think it's beautiful!  It came from your heart and that's what matters the most!

Answer 4

It's nice... It gets a little cheesy at the last stanza.  May I suggest an alternate?  It will have a duel meaning and one will be that of erotica so if it's too much for you then stick with your version :)

I don’t have money, nor bricks, nor the sea,

But come deep into me and feel my riches

See the world from this towering love within me

And float lazily upon my ocean for all of eternity.

I think that will get you two lovers horizontal :D  Enjoy!

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