What does feste the fool from twelfth night say that's funny but smart?

Question

What does feste the fool from twelfth night say that's funny but smart. LIke what does he say that seems funny but when you think about it is really importent,

THanks

Answer 1

Here are three good lines:

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(1) Lady, cucullus non facit monachum; that's as much to say as I wear not motley in my brain.

- This is a very clever way to say that "I am not stupid". He says that the "cowl does not make the monk" in latin, implying that clothes don't make a man. Then he follows it up by saying that he his brain is not wearing "clown clothes".

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(2) "God give them wisdom that have it; and those that are fools, let them use their talents. "

(3) "Why, 'some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrown upon them.'"

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You can find more on your own.

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All of Feste's Line divided by scene for easy reference.

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Let her hang me: he that is well hanged in this

world needs to fear no colours.

He shall see none to fear.

Where, good Mistress Mary?

Well, God give them wisdom that have it; and those

that are fools, let them use their talents.

Many a good hanging prevents a bad marriage; and,

for turning away, let summer bear it out.

Not so, neither; but I am resolved on two points.

Apt, in good faith; very apt. Well, go thy way; if

Sir Toby would leave drinking, thou wert as witty a

piece of Eve's flesh as any in Illyria.

Wit, an't be thy will, put me into good fooling!

Those wits, that think they have thee, do very oft

prove fools; and I, that am sure I lack thee, may

pass for a wise man: for what says Quinapalus?

'Better a witty fool, than a foolish wit.'

[Enter OLIVIA with MALVOLIO]

God bless thee, lady!

Do you not hear, fellows? Take away the lady.

Two faults, madonna, that drink and good counsel

will amend: for give the dry fool drink, then is

the fool not dry: bid the dishonest man mend

himself; if he mend, he is no longer dishonest; if

he cannot, let the botcher mend him. Any thing

that's mended is but patched: virtue that

transgresses is but patched with sin; and sin that

amends is but patched with virtue. If that this

simple syllogism will serve, so; if it will not,

what remedy? As there is no true cuckold but

calamity, so beauty's a flower. The lady bade take

away the fool; therefore, I say again, take her away.

Misprision in the highest degree! Lady, cucullus non

facit monachum; that's as much to say as I wear not

motley in my brain. Good madonna, give me leave to

prove you a fool.

Dexterously, good madonna.

I must catechise you for it, madonna: good my mouse

of virtue, answer me.

Good madonna, why mournest thou?

I think his soul is in h**l, madonna.

The more fool, madonna, to mourn for your brother's

soul being in heaven. Take away the fool, gentlemen.

God send you, sir, a speedy infirmity, for the

better increasing your folly! Sir Toby will be

sworn that I am no fox; but he will not pass his

word for two pence that you are no fool.

Now Mercury endue thee with leasing, for thou

speakest well of fools!

Thou hast spoke for us, madonna, as if thy eldest

son should be a fool; whose skull Jove cram with

brains! for,—here he comes,—one of thy kin has a

most weak pia mater.

Good Sir Toby!

Like a drowned man, a fool and a mad man: one

draught above heat makes him a fool; the second mads

him; and a third drowns him.

He is but mad yet, madonna; and the fool shall look

to the madman.

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How now, my hearts! did you never see the picture

of 'we three'?

I did impeticos thy gratillity; for Malvolio's nose

is no whipstock: my lady has a white hand, and the

Myrmidons are no bottle-ale houses.

Would you have a love-song, or a song of good life?

[Sings]

O mistress mine, where are you roaming?

O, stay and hear; your true love's coming,

That can sing both high and low:

Trip no further, pretty sweeting;

Journeys end in lovers meeting,

Every wise man's son doth know.

[Sings]

What is love? 'tis not hereafter;

Present mirth hath present laughter;

What's to come is still unsure:

In delay there lies no plenty;

Then come kiss me, sweet and twenty,

Youth's a stuff will not endure.

By'r lady, sir, and some dogs will catch well.

'Hold thy peace, thou knave,' knight? I shall be

constrained in't to call thee knave, knight.

I shall never begin if I hold my peace.

Beshrew me, the knight's in admirable fooling.

'His eyes do show his days are almost done.'

Sir Toby, there you lie.

'What an if you do?'

'O no, no, no, no, you dare not.'

Yes, by Saint Anne, and ginger shall be hot i' the

mouth too.

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Are you ready, sir?

Come away, come away, death,

And in sad cypress let me be laid;

Fly away, fly away breath;

I am slain by a fair cruel maid.

My shroud of white, stuck all with yew,

O, prepare it!

My part of death, no one so true

Did share it.

Not a flower, not a flower sweet

On my black coffin let there be strown;

Not a friend, not a friend greet

My poor corpse, where my bones shall be thrown:

A thousand thousand sighs to save,

Lay me, O, where

Sad true lover never find my grave,

To weep there!

No pains, sir: I take pleasure in singing, sir.

Truly, sir, and pleasure will be paid, one time or another.

Now, the melancholy god protect thee; and the

tailor make thy doublet of changeable taffeta, for

thy mind is a very opal. I would have men of such

constancy put to sea, that their business might be

every thing and their intent every where; for that's

it that always makes a good voyage of nothing. Farewell.

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No, sir, I live by the church.

No such matter, sir: I do live by the church; for

I do live at my house, and my house doth stand by

the church.

You have said, sir. To see this age! A sentence is

but a cheveril glove to a good wit: how quickly the

wrong side may be turned outward!

I would, therefore, my sister had had no name, sir.

Why, sir, her name's a word; and to dally with that

word might make my sister wanton. But indeed words

are very rascals since bonds disgraced them.

Troth, sir, I can yield you none without words; and

words are grown so false, I am loath to prove

reason with them.

Not so, sir, I do care for something; but in my

conscience, sir, I do not care for you: if that be

to care for nothing, sir, I would it would make you invisible.

No, indeed, sir; the Lady Olivia has no folly: she

will keep no fool, sir, till she be married; and

fools are as like husbands as pilchards are to

herrings; the husband's the bigger: I am indeed not

her fool, but her corrupter of words.

Foolery, sir, does walk about the orb like the sun,

it shines every where. I would be sorry, sir, but

the fool should be as oft with your master as with

my mistress: I think I saw your wisdom there.

Now Jove, in his next commodity of hair, send thee a beard!

Would not a pair of these have bred, sir?

I would play Lord Pandarus of Phrygia, sir, to bring

a Cressida to this Troilus.

The matter, I hope, is not great, sir, begging but

a beggar: Cressida was a beggar. My lady is

within, sir. I will construe to them whence you

come; who you are and what you would are out of my

welkin, I might say 'element,' but the word is over-worn.

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Will you make me believe that I am not sent for you?

Well held out, i' faith! No, I do not know you; nor

I am not sent to you by my lady, to bid you come

speak with her; nor your name is not Master Cesario;

nor this is not my nose neither. Nothing that is so is so.

Vent my folly! he has heard that word of some

great man and now applies it to a fool. Vent my

folly! I am afraid this great lubber, the world,

will prove a cockney. I prithee now, ungird thy

strangeness and tell me what I shall vent to my

lady: shall I vent to her that thou art coming?

By my troth, thou hast an open hand. These wise men

that give fools money get themselves a good

report—after fourteen years' purchase.

This will I tell my lady straight: I would not be

in some of your coats for two pence.

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Well, I'll put it on, and I will dissemble myself

in't; and I would I were the first that ever

dissembled in such a gown. I am not tall enough to

become the function well, nor lean enough to be

thought a good student; but to be said an honest man

and a good housekeeper goes as fairly as to say a

careful man and a great scholar. The competitors enter.

Bonos dies, Sir Toby: for, as the old hermit of

Prague, that never saw pen and ink, very wittily

said to a niece of King Gorboduc, 'That that is is;'

so I, being Master Parson, am Master Parson; for,

what is 'that' but 'that,' and 'is' but 'is'?

What, ho, I say! peace in this prison!

Sir Topas the curate, who comes to visit Malvolio

the lunatic.

Out, hyperbolical fiend! how vexest thou this man!

talkest thou nothing but of ladies?

Fie, thou dishonest Satan! I call thee by the most

modest terms; for I am one of those gentle ones

that will use the devil himself with courtesy:

sayest thou that house is dark?

Why it hath bay windows transparent as barricadoes,

and the clearstores toward the south north are as

lustrous as ebony; and yet complainest thou of

obstruction?

Madman, thou errest: I say, there is no darkness

but ignorance; in which thou art more puzzled than

the Egyptians in their fog.

What is the opinion of Pythagoras concerning wild fowl?

What thinkest thou of his opinion?

Fare thee well. Remain thou still in darkness:

thou shalt hold the opinion of Pythagoras ere I will

allow of thy wits, and fear to kill a woodcock, lest

thou dispossess the soul of thy grandam. Fare thee well.

Nay, I am for all waters.

[Singing]

'Hey, Robin, jolly Robin,

Tell me how thy lady does.'

'My lady is unkind, perdy.'

'Alas, why is she so?&#39