What does this side of me indicate?

Question

I'm a 27-year-old woman.I have this tendency to feel a combination of motherly,sisterly,friendly & "loverly" love towards the guy I love.Also I never want to depend on him.Instead I want him to depend on me.I don't want his support but I want to support him.And what might sound even more odd is I wanna look after him,bathe him,feed him,put him to sleep,hug him & kiss him to let him know everything is alright,do everything for him,give him every comfort,happiness & all I can give,and take care of him like my own child!I don't wanna take anything from him.I only wanna give him.I'm not attracted to the so-called "macho" type men.I'm attracted to tender male beauty.Why do I feel this way?

Answer 1

I really relate to your experience. I have found that the reason I feel compelled to have relationships like this is because I suffer from something called "Codependency." It might be worth-while to look over the link I've provided -- it describes patterns of codependency. It may illuminate your situation more thoroughly. If you feel like in this process you are losing yourself, or if you feel like all your effort is not appreciated, and resentments begin to grow -- you may actually be significantly reducing your quality of life by continuing this behavior, and may someday be in a situation where you are significantly more depressed and vulnerable.

I say, take a look at your actions and for each one, ask yourself what you are achieving by behaving that way. As an adult, your partner has a right to chose and live his own life, and by taking care of his responsibilities for him, you are actually intruding on his fundamental freedoms and rights as a person. You may be keeping him from learning vital lessons, or growing in the ways he needs to.