What exactly will happen to my kids if I leave my fiance? ?

Question

I need someone who has experience with this. I want to leave my fiance, he is not a good husband or father to our two kids. But If i were to leave him, can i take my kids with me? or can he take them? or how does that work? I am so scared that he will get full custody, since when living with him, he was the bread winner and i was his stay at home wife. Please tell me what I can do. If I do leave I will most likely have to stay with a relative till i get a job etc. Thanks in advance

Answer 1

the mother usually has priority over the father the best thing you can do is save some money to get you a place anyway that you can and find a job and a babysitter before leaving. You have to prove you are stable and can care for your children to the court. There is no marriage to dissolve which is a good thing when it comes to real money issues. Some lawyers will do this for you pro bono... Does your fiance know what you are about to do? I was asking this because I wonder if you two have discussed a just in case scenario... you know what would happen to the kids if you happen to split up, who wants custody, does he want rights to the kids, etc....

Answer 2

well if i were you first i will start building my life - find a job then save money with out telling him and when you feel strong  you can start the move of leaving him.... you need to be smart don't let him know what you planing to do, i know it's not easy but for your kids you have to be strong.... good luck

Answer 3

take a chance! good luck!

Answer 4

Something the courts will have to decide.  Maybe the two of you can come to mutual agreement. Good luck to you.

Answer 5

No, he can't take the kids because he was the bread winner. Actually, after you take him to domestics he will have to pay support and possibly palimony if you have lived together long enough.

So while you still will need to find a job, that money from him will help.

In choosing a relative or friend to stay with be careful. If he wants to get custody, he will try to latch on to anything he can to make you appear to be unfit... so if someone has a drug problem or a past or whatever.. don't stay with them... you would be better off going to a women's shelter. Also, it may be in your best interest to plan this a little. Rent a small storage unit they are pretty inexpensive.. and move some things into it that he really wouldn't notice missing. Like some clothes, pictures, things you don't want to lose. Then I would try to leave when he was at work and take whatever furniture you wanted (your kids need beds) and put them in there too until you find a place of your own. That way you won't have those things to buy... if you leave with just clothes and stuff you will never see the other stuff and have to start completely from scratch.

Goodluck!

Answer 6

Well depending on the state that you live in the kids go with the mom unless there is a legal reason to not let them go with the mom and you might be considered conman law I would call a family law attorney and talk to them.