What gives us the right to be so judgemental?

Question

What is it that makes most people in this section so d**n judgemental... does it really matter that someone wants to give their child some *gasp* formula... or that someone else started their child on solids at 3 months. We have no right to put anyone down for the way they raise their child unless they are being abusive/neglectful.

We judge for everything... I'm sure the 16 year old that is freaking out about being pregnant isn't feeling too great and the last thing she needs is for someone to tell her to keep her legs shut.

Ok so yeah... this is a bit of a rant and I'll prob be reported but it is a question too...

Do you think society is too judgemental and do you think Mothers (especially many on Y!A) are more judgemental than others.

Answer 1

I think society is too judgmental, but I think these days we have a reason to be. And I also think it's not just mothers on here, but all mothers. Look at the society we have to raise our babies in. I am scared to take my kids outside, and I am terrified to send my son to school next year. So yes, I will admit I am very judgemental and more so of strangers, but you need to remember too, people come on here to get other peoples opinions, so if someone asks "I am 12, how can I have s*x and not get pregnant?" I may occasionally tell them to keep their legs closed if that's the best advice I can think to give. And you know what? I will probally think to myself that she needs some self control and that maybe she is even a s***k for having s*x at 12. Is that so wrong of me to judge in that situation. I think not.

Answer 2

I know,I totally agree with ya.I think some people just aren't happy unless they are putting others down especially if they are making the same choices as them.I honestly couldn't care less what others say about me.Let them judge!!I know that I am a great mother and wife.I make choices that work best for my family,I don't care what anyone thinks about it.I do get what you are saying though and it does get old,but I just let it go in one ear and out the other.

Answer 3

haha - I ask this so many times, it's unreal.

I couldn't really careless what anyone on here thought about me, I know what a fantastic woman, mother & wife I am - I don't need anyone else telling me any different.

People are just as b!tchy in real life - The only difference is on here they can hide behind their computer, & it's straight up in your face.

They need something to talk about, I think while they are picking on me, they are leaving some other poor bugger alone.

Answer 4

OK - from a males respective,,,,  there is nothing wrong with being jugemental,,,, nothing i or anybody else can say to resolve judgmental people for see we are all judgmental or we wouldn't be given our oppinion / answers on here, we can only incourage the young ladies and gentlman that one day there bodies will speak to them , and they have to be strong and make the right choices, for no person is perfect and accidents happen ,, but when we give in / up on the young adults is when we fail as parents, and the chain keep going and going ,,, i fought in court for my daughter and son and won, we my children understand my mistakes and they learn from them as well if we educate our kids more at home we can only hope for the best for when the time comes that there bodies wanting to experiment, we can only explain to them what to expect and the results of the negative outcome that it could impact on there long life ahead they want to live. ... thxs wlp

Answer 5

No one has any right to be judgemental towards anyone else due to the fact that NO ONE and yes I repeat NO ONE is the perfect person...I am a mother of 2 with another on the way at age 21 and even I know that! I judge people sometimes,I'm not even gonna lie,but when you see the same question posted by the same person 6 times just worded differently and it is by far(most of the time) the dumbest question you've ever read...its hard not to judge. Like for example: "I had unprotected s*x with my b/f,I'm pregnant now...how did this happen?" now just word that a little differently  6 times in a row and TRY your hardest not to say something along the lines of "DUH"

and I guess sometimes people consider it as a'What goes around comes around' situation...I know I have been judged for years because I had my first daughter at 17,my second at 20,and now 7 almost 8 months pregnant with my third little diva at age 21...I do not look like I am 21 and I think even if I did look older than 15 people would still judge me and say I'm a bad mom because I'm young.They always have and always will....just by looking at me.They don't know that I have only slept with ONE MAN in my entire life and that is my husband,all 3 of my daughters belong to HIM and HIM ONLY, he works his BUTT off to take care of us so I can stay at home and take care of the girls. My daughters ALWAYS get what they need...and are always put before our needs. Thus  being the reason why they have clothes and everything else they need and I still have the same clothes from before I was pregnant with my first daughter. I do not pawn my girls off on other people...the only time I EVER have someone watch my girls for me is when my hubby is working and I have a doctors appointment  or a dentist appointment and COULD NOT keep a close eye on them or hold them,and it was my mom who watched them for me seeing as I trust no one else to watch my children(worry wart so to speak)...they always go with me when I leave to the store or gas station or ANYWHERE else.I do not drink,I don't do drugs,none of that BS. Also I was never and still am not one to party...I think its pointless and dumb....on my 21st Bday I stayed at home with my daughters and ate the "yummy" cake that my oldest helped make with her dad for me...I had a blast and didn't think twice about going to some bar just because I could.

So in that aspect I think some of us(and yes I include myself sometimes on this) feel its only fair and right to judge others the way they have judged us...I'm not saying it is the right thing to do but when you take so much of something...its only a matter of time until you start firing back.

Hope that helped a little.

Answer 6

nothing gives people the right to be so judgemental, it is all about self-righteousnes.

Answer 7

I agree, nobody's perfect, we need to get over ourselves. Though young teens saying they want to get pregnant really makes me frustrated and sad.

Answer 8

When someone is doing or about to do something dumb...I am going to tell them...especially when they ask for my opinion...if they don't want it then don't ask for it. Telling a woman that breast-feeding is the best way to feed her baby is NOT judgmental it is just Good Information...and telling either new moms or inexperienced moms NOT to feed their babies solids until they are over 6 months is NOT judgmental it is giving them educated information regarding their babies health now and for the future...as far as the 16 year old pregnant girl...that is a different matter...she needs compassion and good advice not cruelty by telling her to keep her legs closed...hopefully she will learn from one unintended pregnancy and not do it again.

Answer 9

Its really just people in general who feel the need to express their opinions, often times, esoecially on here we will ask a simple question and get personal opinions on what we have said even thouhg we never asked for an opinion . It seems as though sometimes the people on here just rant about what you are doing wrong and are no help at all with your question, it drives me nuts really. But thats just people for you.

Answer 10

Yes I do, but I have been guilty of it all well. I try to keep an open mind, but when people come on here asking why there 2 week old is sick after every feeding of chocolate pudding (Ok an extreme example, but you know what I mean), what I am supposed to say? Lol, those are the only times I think I come off as "judgemental".

Also, it is hard to determine a person's tone online. They may be sincerely trying to be helpful and give good advice, but it comes off as snooty and judgmental. Know what I mean?

Answer 11

People judge others because we think we know better even if we don't. I think society is too judgmental. I try not to be, but sometimes I just can't help it.

Answer 12

The anonymity of the internet... A lot of the people who are judgemental, if they were say sitting in a group of friends and friends of friends and were asked a silly question - they would probably answer it a lot differently then they do on here. People seem to forget there manners sometimes here.

Answer 13

I agree, thought this site was to help each other. Sort of neat to get advice, thinking you will not be judged!!! Some people just dont feel good unless they deliver bad news.  Glad I do not know them personally!!!!!!!!