What has happened to the adoption board?

Question

Someone thinks it would be cool to adopt a child whose legs are fused and I get sent back to square one for calling them an idiot?

People use raw, raunchy language and I get penalized for telling someone to do some research?

I get suspended for vocalizing FATHERS RIGHTS?

Just wanted you all to know that.

I'm currious to hear your thoughts on this.

This board used to be full of legitimate questions with heart felt answers. Now it's a three ring circus, a struggle for who has more right to be here, who has more power to control the board. It's sad really I have learned a lot here, so have many others. Now it's comparable to polls and surveys. Ask stupid questions just to gain points. It's called the adoption section not the adoptive section or the relinquish section. Who would know better than an adoptee how one feels?

Answer 1

That stinks

I too got suspended over nothing.. a couple people in here REALLY don't like me, because I see through them, and they constantly reported my questions anytime they thought the report could conceivably be concidered legit

Keep appealing... I got my account back the way it was.. Incidentally,  it was reinstated IMMEDIATELY after my 2nd appeal letter, the email in which I said that it was just a grudge against me and named names.... hmmmm... think I might have hit the nail on the head with the names I named? BOOM.. 20 minutes later, my account is back up..

so keep appealing.. 2 or three emails if you must.

and it just goes to show that there are those who hate PAPs and constantly bash them on here.. It's not just the Adoptees or firstparents that get the "hate"

Answer 2

The same thing that happened to adoption.

Answer 3

You are soooo right.

Answer 4

Gosh, that sucks, you should NOT have been suspended for that. Like others, I do hope you appealed.

Yeah, there has been a more than usually high percentage of lame questions lately, and I'm also missing many of the adoptee voices. I'm thinking (okay, hoping) that some of them are just really busy with the Adoptee Rights demonstration and maybe are taking a break from here, and that they will be back. I hope so anyway!

I do agree that it is ludicrous that adoptees would be "shushed" on an adoption board. Who knows the most about adoption anyway?

ETA: Btw, the question about how cool it would be to adopt a child with fused legs seems to be gone. I don't know if she removed it or Y!A did. I do think she was probably about 12. Yeah, the question was ignorant, but who isn't at that age? When I answered I tried to let her know it wasn't "cool" to think of actual people that way, but not be too hard on her. Maybe she learned from our answers and deleted her question? I hope so.

Answer 5

Lori,

I can not believe that happened to you.  Please appeal.  It has been harder and harder to stay here.  I miss so many of the people who have left.  Its a joke to have an adoption section that doesn't seem to care about the voice or opinions of adoptees.  Adoption should be all about the child, you know, the adoptee.

((((((((hugs))))))))

Answer 6

It's not just the adoption section. I have seen the same in other sections (parenting and the like) Lots of people inventing stories and families with outlandish tales. I could probably name 4 posters that I believe are the same person. You just have to not take this place to serious and consider that you have no idea who these people are. And definitely not take their wisdom serious.

Answer 7

I think if people took the time to acknowledge that asking a question, however inappropriate you may think it is, is an opportunity to enlighten them about adoption and its idiosyncracies rather than mocking them or insulting them, we could really educate so many more people.

I think we've all been slammed, insulted and mocked here when asking or answering questions, welcome to the club.

So in the spirit of Sunny an Possum, let's all grow some thicker skin, it's just a computer screen with anonymous people on the other end.

Answer 8

Wow - you got suspended for that question? Wow.

I certainly hope you appealed.

I like to believe that the crazy questions (like the one about adopting the child with the fused legs being "cool") are asked by 12 year olds whose parents don't monitor what they are doing online.

The rest ... well, you have to wade through a lot to get to the substance here. (And it seems to be more so now than even when I joined up, or the time I was simply lurking before that)

BUT - I think the substance that is here is worth the work of reading all the crazy, mean and downright stupid things. (of course, I may change my mind on that at some point.)

Answer 9

you are so right. What else can I say..