What has your mother taught you?

Question

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.

"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.

"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.

"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.

"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.

'If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.

"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.

"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.

"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.

"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.

"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.

"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.

"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.

"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOUR MODIFICATION.

"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.

"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother ! taught me about ANTICIPATION.

"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.

"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.

"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, They are going to freeze that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.

"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOUR.

"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.

"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.

"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.

"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.

"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. And my favourite: my mother taught me about JUSTICE.

"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

Answer 1

She taught me practically everything. Except education she can't really speak proper english. Sorry mom love you!! :D

Answer 2

nothing she's a horrible person

Answer 3

Very good - how come most of these quotes seem very familiar?!

Answer 4

Hahaha , well that just about somes up what my mother taught me

Answer 5

what website did you copy all this from?!

Answer 6

1. That you are the most annoying cartoon character on earth.

Answer 7

Always wear clean underwear in case someone sees it!

Answer 8

More than I can say, both good and bad but never with malice.

Answer 9

My ex mother in law is a fantastic woman,I get on with her like she was my mum..she has taught me that it is NOT wrong to dislike her son,and in fact she is the first to admit he's a to$$er!! :-)

Answer 10

that sounds like my mother!! and what she said all the time to me!!

I don't get along with her at all really, I'm been nice because she put the DVO on me, and SHE has custody of MY daughter!!

Mum kicked me out when i was 14 years old, I learnt how/about life from other people, one of those my aunty (who wish was my mum!),

I'm 25 now living with my partner and due to have our bub in March, so far mum has tried real hard in her put downs, but bub well be 4 months old before she meets him/her!! she brought this on herself ~ I haven't done any thing wrong!!

Answer 11

Lets just say lots!!