What if you find out who you are, but don't really like who you have found?

Question

can you mold or change yourself?

we are so very shaped by society

Answer 1

It's impossible not to like what you have found once you have found it. Because in truth all of us are works of art, and we all stand for love. Once you find yourself, you will love it.

The dislike of some of your characterisitics would be some defense mechanisms as well as insecurities that we project sometimes. However, once we get to know ourselves better, we can stop the manifestation of these unpleasant insecurities.

So in essence we keep getting better and spreading love to others with our full cup. Its impossible to truly dislike ourselves then.

Answer 2

You are the one you want to be. Make up your mind about that.. everything changes.. of course you can change yourself.

Answer 3

I think you can change. I remember one time I read a horoscope that said I was likely to accidentally offend people or hurt people's feelings by speaking before I thought. I decided to make sure I never did it again. When I crack jokes I want people to feel good, not bad, so from then on I began to be more aware of what I said. I changed that part of myself.

As for being molded by society, yes, that's true, but I always go way out of my way to be aware of the affect it has on me and work very hard not to become a blind follower.

If you are aware, then you can change it. The problem is those who are not aware or choose to ignore those parts of themselves that aren't so nice.

PS: I do seem to be much more well-liked than before.

Answer 4

You must clearly understand who you are,and why you are the way you are, and change what you don't like. Good question. Many people rarely get to this point in life.  

Answer 5

If you have recognized that you don't like yourself, then you recognized that you are a woman that doesn't like herself. I think you have 3 choices: You can continue being a person that doesn't like itself, you can become a person that grows to like what it once didn't, or you can change yourself to your liking.Whether or not society has anything to do with how it molded your life, unfortunately doesnt matter. You have to deal with the consequences. It all comes down to how important it is to you.

Answer 6

Correction: The society affects us, but we are the output of whom we allow ourselves to be.

Make a list of the positive and negative sides you have discovered in yourself.

Praise yourself for the good points and decide which points you'll never let go.

Be honest with yourself about the negative sides and decide what kind of change do you need to do. Notice that somethings may be changed in 1 week time but others take years to change.

Keep changing into what you feel is the best because a still character that never changes is a character that stopped developing and growing. It's exactly like the biology principle: "organs you don't use, you lose"

An important thing to do is love yourself the way it is but be consistent that you want the best for yourself and that's the reason you're changing. You never change for someone or some aim but you change for yourself.

I know it's hard growing up but I'm sure the smart mind that recognized its depth can cope with growing up. Good luck :)

Answer 7

If you find you are someone you don't like you are not that person. We aren't 'this' or 'that' we can change.  

Answer 8

Yes very true we are. And you can break free of the trend, ignore the influences and be yourself, and be proud of it. I recommend you watch a movie called "Into the Wild". You may feel compelled to be yourself after watching.

Check out this song from the movie http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cy6iwP9Ux...

Answer 9

There is always the choice to do or be better for oneself! It's a matter of doing it!

Answer 10

Any dislike of yourself comes from within your mind. That's where the change needs to take place.

Answer 11

well if u dnt like whom uve found then i guess be a friend rather than making him BF and if still u dnt like him or her then i guess either dnt be tht persons friend or change ur thinking.

But yes society does shape a individual a lot.

Answer 12

G-Basic change is difficult, but you can change poison into medicine by converting your negative characteristics to strength by helping others understand what to do and what not to do. You need a philosophy based on reality, not some preacher's desire for more income, in order to do that.

Everybody is a mixture of the beneficial and the harmful. You can change the mix in the direction you want.

Answer 13

Anyone has the power to change oneself . Most do not recognize this power . It comes from within .

Answer 14

Two words.

Tony Robbins.

We change when the pain of being, & the desire to become, exceeds the pain of changing.

Being 'shaped by society' is a lame @ss excuse for not wanting to endure the pain of changing.

Change is inevitable.  It's direction flows from the depth of your passion.

Good Luck.

Answer 15

Society only changes your thought process and you're the one who decides what you want to be, how you want to live, and what you want to do.

But because there are restraints it holds most people back from molding themselves into what they want.

There are consequences for thinking you're a lion, you could get put in a mental home.

Or imagining you're a monster, and you kill everyone, you're put in jail.

Society wants people to want the same things "money, education, clothes, love, cars"

But think about how the world would be if we all just did what we wanted and acted like a lion all of the time.

If we all lived just how we wanted and did what we wanted don't you think society would be a bit out of hand???

But then again, you'd see the truth in everything.

Or another way to look at it....

Imagine sitting alone thinking about everything you want to think about  and then along comes a lady.

Did she not just alter your thoughts by being there?

Your mind shifted just to let you know she was there but only because you saw her, or you heard her.

You just gave up your own thoughts to whatever else was around.

You're always going to be influenced by SOMETHING. No matter what it's just you who decides.