What is a good "rule of thumb" for siblings borrowing each others clothing or accessories?

Question

For example--what if one wants to borrow but the other is not willing to loan? Should there be a different protocol if the clothing was something the parent bought or if it is something the child purchased with allowance or babysitting/etc. money?

Answer 1

That is a daily fight in my home!  One daughter doesn't care if the other wants to wear her stuff, but the other doesn't like to share.  My rule, if Sis1 borrows a shirt, then Sis2 gets to borrow a shirt.  If Sis2 won't share, then forget borrowing Sis1's stuff.  That's the only way to deal with it, if you try to force it, Sis1 Sis2, and Mom will all end up ticked off in the end.  

Answer 2

This is a toughie.

In general, it doesn't matter who bought the clothes/ accessories it is up to the owner to make the decision about loaning. If they aren't willing to loan, that's that.

There should also be a punishment for borrowing without asking to enforce respect for other's property (i.e. removal of a favorite article of clothing or item for a pre-set period of time, or allowing the sibling whose clothes were taken to borrow something of the taker's of their choice)  

Answer 3

In my words. DON'T! If the owner still fits it and is wearing it, and doesn't want to loan it to a sibling then they shouldn't be forced to. Kids often have attachments to certain outfits and sometimes things can't be replaced if it gets lost or ruined and it's just not fair to the kid who owns the clothes.

Answer 4

Clothes should be borrowed at the owners expense, if the answers no, then respect that persons wishes. done

Answer 5

In our house, if the owner of the object (if they paid for it or not) doesn't want to lend it, the answer is no.  It rarely happens here, but if it does, the child not willing to share usually has a very good reason not to want to.

Answer 6

Ask before you borrow and if the answer's no, then it's no.  Treat any borrowed item with respect and make sure you don't soil it.  If you ruin the borrowed item, you replace it.

Answer 7

Don't force kids to loan clothing or accessories.

What I always did with my younger sister: I would let her borrow what she wanted...and then take collateral. I've found the best collateral tends to be their pillow to ensure my item was back by bedtime.

Remind your kids that they should share, and you can encourage them to loan something...but bottom line, let them be responsible for their own stuff. That's how it will be in the real world...

Answer 8

you break it you bought it

Answer 9

Nope.  No different protocol.  The bottom line is that those 'jeans' are hers...whether bought for her BY her or by YOU.  

If you allow one to "borrow" against the others wishes you'll be reinforcing a lack of respect for others belongings.