What is a really funny joke? seriously like not something stupid lol

Question

i really want to make someone laugh and i have no good jokes haha any help?

Answer 1

Here is my favorite joke-

A girl is sleeping at a church group.

The leader of the group sais "Whatch this girl, she is magic. I will ask her a question, poke her with a pencil, and she will say the answer."

The man said "Who made the Earth" and poked the girl with the pencil.

She exclaimed "GOD!"

She drifted back to sleep. Later the man said "Who died to save our sins. The girl yelled "JESUS CHRIST!"

Later the man said "What did Eve say to Adam after their 25th baby."

The girl woke up and said "IF YOU POKE ME WITH THAT STICK ONE MORE TIME I WILL BREAK IT IN HALF!"

:)

Answer 2

Doctor, "What seems to be the problem?"

Patient, "Doc, I've got the farts. I mean I f**t all the time,"

The Doctor nods, "Hmm."

Patient, "My farts do not stink and you can't hear them. It's just that I f**t all the time. Look, we've been talking here for about 10 minutes and I've farted five times. You didn't hear them and you don't smell them, do you?"

"Hmm," says the Doctor,

He picks up his pad and writes out a prescription.

The patient is thrilled "Great doc. This prescription, will it really clear up my farts?"

"No," sighs the Doctor, "The prescription is to clear your sinuses. Next week I want you back here for a hearing test."

Answer 3

1. Men are like .......Laxatives ..... They irritate the c**p out of you.

2. Men are like ......Bananas ...... The older they get, the less firm they

are.

3. Men are like .......Weather ..... Nothing can be done to change them.

4. Men are like .....Blenders ... You need One, but you're not quite sure

why.

5. Men are like .....Chocolate Bars ... Sweet, smooth, & they usually head

right for your hips.

6. Men are like ....Commercials ...... You can't believe a word they say.

7. Men are like Department Stores .... Their clothes are always 1/2 off.

8. Men are like .. Government Bonds ... . They take soooooooo long to

mature.

9. Men are like .. Mascara ..... They usually run at the first sign of

emotion.

10. Men are like ......Popcorn ..... They satisfy you, but only for a little

while.

11. Men are like .......Lava Lamps ... Fun to look at, but not very bright.

12. Men are like Parking Spots ....... All the good ones are taken, the rest

are handicapped.

Answer 4

Okay this is a dumb blond joke but I'm a natural blond so please, no blonds take offense to it!

A blond and her date were out for a midnight walk, he says to her jokingly, what do you think is closer the moon or the Eiffel Tower?  She looked up at the large full moon and said, Duh, the moon.  You can't see the Eiffel Tower can you?