What is a substitute for a Baby Shower?

Question

I don't want to have a "traditional" baby shower. I do not like the idea of the silly games and the invitation list being all women. I would like to invite all my friends and family (men and children included) to a get together before the baby is born but I am worried about one thing... that men will not want to come to it for the fear it will be a bunch of hens sitting around clucking to each other about being a mother. This is my first child and I am very excited about becoming a mother, I am looking for a happy medium to share my excitement with my friends, families and colleagues all together.

Thanks!!

Answer 1

An afternoon/evening BBQ party but even if you are not calling it a baby shower the focus is still on the unborn baby so it will still be like one....however, the men can all chat to one another and the women can ohh and ahh over the baby gifts.

Answer 2

BBQ and BEER = all will come!

Congrats & good luck!

Answer 3

That's great idea.  You can call it a Friends and Family Baby Shower.  In my case, I was at the mercy of the people throwing me the party.  I wish I'd thought to suggest something like your idea.

The men probably won't want to be there for the opening of the presents, and it may be acceptable for them to unofficially sneak away outside or to another room without anyone making a big deal out of it.

Answer 4

I think of the Rugrats Movie, where they just have a big party outside with food and people just standing around.  But that's a cartoon....

My suggestion would be to have more a family get together type party. With music and drinks and food, at your house and outside.

Answer 5

My husband and I had a co-ed shower and on the invitation we wrote that all men had to bring a package of diapers for the 'daddy-to-be.' We had beer and bbq and the guys really had a good time too.

ADD::  We also got so many diapers that we never had to buy any at all.

Answer 6

Jack and Jill parties are for friends of both genders to come and celebrate with you.  You can host is yourself or have a friend do it.  You will not receive many gifts at a mixed party so you may want to have a separate party for a baby shower or wait for the birth and have a baby shower then where all are invited but men will avoid unless you stress the fact that there will be a separate place for the men to do the manly things associated with a new father.  (Smoke cigars or whatever.)

Answer 7

It sounds like you'd like to have a "Jack and Jill" type of baby shower, right? The easiest way to get around that is to host it yourself, rather than to have a friend host it. However, keep in mind that "jack and jill" type of events do not typically involve gifts...so if you are still expecting to get pre-baby gifts, you will likely be out of luck.  

Answer 8

If you are registering for gifts, I wouldn't open them infront of everyone, because I personally can barely stomach the ooh-ing and ahh-ing, so I can't imagine subjecting a group of guys to that! Which would present a problem for all those who do love to see their gifts opened and want to gush over all the little booties and diapers. other than a Jack and Jill type shower where few people would bring gifts, I think you will have to suck it up and go the traditional route, simply because if you're really honest, the only reason you even have a baby shower is so people can help you out with neccesities for the baby, seeing as that everything costs so much. If you want to celebrate the pending new life, a better time would be after the birth, no? And, just to warn you, it will be a bunch of women talking about being a mom, but once you have your own kid, you'll realize there's few topics you'd rather talk about than your kids! :)

Answer 9

I love traditional baby showers and I wouldn't be comfortable going to one where men are.

My sister did the whole new- age men and women mix shower and it was boring and awkward.

EDIT: And no one brought my sister any gifts! She hosted the thing with her baby's father's mother and it was awful and dead. People came for the food and didn't bring a thing, but their appetites.

When I eventually get pregnant I'm going all traditonal and having a family member host it.

Answer 10

How about a couples shower?  You are BOTH having the baby so you should "both" be involved in the occasion.  I made a daddy tool belt for one guy and he LOVED it...you can "guy it up" with virgin martinis, etc.  Make it classy...skip the games (I did at my niece's shower and it was MUCH appreciated).  Make it a casino night (or something similar) with the mom and dad getting a gift if they win or the others giving a gift when they win...just thinking out loud here.  

Answer 11

A Baby Bath!

Answer 12

Just don't call it a shower, call it a party.  Since it's people you know, you can let them know it's in place of a shower, but you wanted it to be something both men and women would enjoy.  Have food and a cake, relax and let it go from there.  You may find yourself wishing for that traditional shower later on , though, they're actually pretty fun.  No reason you can't have two parties!