What is a tactful and loving way of telling my husband to quit calling me from work and complaining ?

Question

about his job...........when things arent going good at work he will call me and go off about his coworkers and about people and things i have no idea about.....i know he needs to vent but then the rest of my day i feel like c**p . i try to not dwell on negative c**p and he wants to be so negative all the time.....i know his job gets on his nerves but doesnt everyones?......its just on my nerves.......anyone?

Answer 1

As hard as it may seem, when he calls with the complaining nonsense, I would just say"Well quit then" and hang up. Don't answer the phone again and when he comes home, tell him your not his boss and it's making you a wreck, just stop it. You have to set healthy boundaries for yourself, husband or no husband.  

Answer 2

Ask him to wait til he comes home to tell ya?

Answer 3

How about when they won't shut about it after work.  Arg.  

Answer 4

I know the feeling! forget tactful, tell him to stop phoning you cos it's bloody boring.

Answer 5

He needs to vent...if he can't talk to you, who can he turn to?  

Answer 6

Does this happen often?  Tell him to quit crying and find a new job!

Answer 7

When I do this to my spouse, my husband lets me know that he understands and asks if we can talk about it after work.  I feel silly,and agree to let him back to work.  By the end of the day, I've either forgotten about what ticked me off or I have resolved the issue well enough to not stress my husband out when I see him.  

Answer 8

Listen to him for a while-like 10 minutes. Let him vent, being supportive and understanding. Then tell him about your boring stories or even better-your problems at home or at work. Continue to do this but next time shorten the listening time and increase the complaining time of yours. This way he should call you less but be careful don't be addicted to what you're doing (complaining.) If he doesn't change, start calling him at work yourself. Never complain about his call until he starts it first.

Hope this helps. Good luck.

Answer 9

look at it like this:  your husband feels like you are his friend, he is comfortable talking to you, likes hearing your support, and admires you for your courage in the suggestions you provide to help him handle it.  feel good that your husband looks at you this way and continue being a supportive wife while encouraging him on the skills he has.  i know you want to say "well get a new job!" but you know it's not that easy.  instead, you could tell him "honey, you're the best employee they have, and they depend on you".  encourage him to look for new work by suggesting that a day off from work would be a good way for him to rest, relax - and maybe put applications out there "just to see what happens. no pressure".  

it'll work out.  stay with him on this.  right now he needs you.

Answer 10

Are we supposed to be tactful and loving when talking to our husbands, lol?

Answer 11

Maybe u can tell him to focus on what he is grateful for and that his occupation is enabling him to put food on the table =)

You can also plan for a trip somewhere remote during the winter or what have you - as a reward for the both of you for working so hard and keeping positive. Good luck! xo