What is different about the kids of yesterday versus the kids of today? Read on...................?

Question

My mother who is 70 believes that if she had to raise kids in todays world she wouldnt do anything different then she did before. She says that she would never have TVs in bedrooms, cell phones to take to school, or all of these gadgets and toys that kids are getting, and at Christmas and birthdays they get way to many things. I have a 12 and 15 year old and I believe that kids are different and I do believe it is because they are getting too much. But I believe if my mother would treat her children of today the same as yesterday it wouldnt work because they would still act the same and find out a way to get the same things as other kids. Everyone says that kids of today are the most selfish, but is it because parents give them anything they want, to keep up with other parents? Could it also be because mothers are working and they don't see what their teenagers are up to, when they are hanging out with the wrong kind of kids?

Answer 1

yes. Children's parents are buying them things out of selfishness though, so they don't have to feel bad about putting their child in a latch-key program five days a week so both parents can work to put their children in a house that's 1000 square feet more than they need. If mother's stayed home there'd be less money to spend on frivolousness and more well behaved children. period.

Answer 2

I do not believe a child needs a credit card, a cellphone, etc. Of course, they are going to complain if they don't get it. But heh, I complained, back then, when my mom said I couldn't have this or that too. She stood her ground. Having gadgets and toys are not bad things, but I believe if a child is responsable enough to have a cell, he is responsable enough to pay the bill. Same for credit cards. As for IPods and such... well I had a walkman disc player, so it's pretty much the same --except technology has changed. Most parents I see just give everything to their child cause they don't have / take the time to deal with it.

Answer 3

We should give our children what they need - NOT what they think they need.  I am not an old person I am only 29, I am with all that technology stuff but there is a limit for children.

Spending too much time on Internet or TV is not in my house.

Cellulars for under 18 year olds not in my house.  "My phone could be given to my under 18 child only on weekends if they are out with friends"

I will give allowance only if they are helping with chores around the house.

I am willing to let my children date @ 16 ONLY if I meet the person in advance and the first date should be at home where adults are available. "not necessarily be in the same room though"

I was very lucky to have lived in yesterdays world, it sure is a lot safer.

Answer 4

Yeah I don't think kids today are that much different than kids in the past. It's the parents who have changed. My kids have a TV in their room, video games, ipods, etc...but these things are limited. They are involved in sports, school activities, we have a halfepipe skateboarding ramp in the backyard, they bike ride, we are on the go a lot doing outside activities. My 11 yr old has a cell phone...he paid for it himself.

The world itself has changed. As the world changes, people need to change with it. Unless you live in an amish community, you need to know how to work electronics and computers to get along in today's world. My kids aren't selfish at all. They work for their allowance and they buy a lot of the things they have themself with allowance and birthday money. They don't get everything they want. It's important for kids to learn that they have to work for the things they want.

many people think the problem with kids today is no discipline. I think parents have become so busy that their discipline has become lazy. Many people assume it's all about spanking or not spanking however I've never spanked any of my kids and yet they are all well behaved and respectful. It's about having set rules and consequences and being consistent. having good communication. Setting limits and so on. There is a lack of overall discipline though. many parents both work and are tired and it's easier to give in than deal with issues of course this is not true of all two working families.

So anyway I don't think kids have changed on their own, the world has changed, parents have changed and as a result, children have changed.

Answer 5

There's always been a generation gap, and  it seems like  every older generation has thought their grandchildren were being spoiled or selfish or somehow not raised correctly.  I don't think today's kids are any more selfish than any other generation, and although they may have more material things, very few parents give their kids everything they want.  

Kids are always self-centered - it's a normal developmental stage - and it's not the same as being selfish. I think technology has made today's kids are more aware of what's going on in the world around them and given them more opportunities to help those in need.  I've seen some wonderful examples in my own community.  

And please don't blame working mothers. They are doing what they have to do to support their families, just like working fathers.  Teens have always been very good at hiding their behavior from their parents,  even when most moms stayed home.

Answer 6

The difference, primarily...

The generation of today's parents dont like the way their parents parenteed.  They didnt like being grounded.  They didnt like being the only get who didnt get this or that.  They grew up hating their parents (everyone loves their parents, but hating the way they were treated, I guess)

So, they decided to try being their child's friend.  They didnt want their child to be mad at them, they didnt want their child to feel left out.

The thing though...  parents are NOT meant to be friends.  Parents are to keep you safe and teach you how to live in the real world, to keep you out of trouble.  And, quite frankly, sometimes that means doing things that you know your child will hate you for.

Part of my theory is personal experience.  My parents, especially my step dad, were very much into tough love.  I hated it.  THey made me mad beyond belief.  I never lacked anything I needed, but \if I got what I wanted it was because I worked for it.  I thought the same thing.

My cousin was one of those too.  Hated the way her parents grounded her and she didnt get to go out.  So she decided to be her son's friend.  He is 19, and in the last 2 years has totalled a vehicle, blew 2 other motors up, 3 speeding tickets, hit and run, shoplifting, failure to appear.  And mommy keeps on bailing him out.  Of everything.  3 years ago his specific words to me were 'I dont care if I get in trouble because I never get in trouble"

I also think some of it is guilt.  They are guilty that they are not around because they are working or out or whatever.  So out of guilt they try to give the child everything they want, since they cant give their time.

Answer 7

you have almost answered this one yourself,kids do get what they want and I do think as parents we want to make up for the time we dont get to spend with them, but kids aren't silly they know how to play the game,they know we don't know what they know especially when we aren't around, kids have learn't a whole new way to exist that defeats us,this is why things are so different than when our parents were raising us,one parent stayed at home generally now it's not always possible

Answer 8

Everything is cyclical.  When your mom raised her kids I wonder what HER mom thought?  Probably that the kids were spoiled with indoor plumbing and being bussed to school and not having to work on a farm.

Yes, of course it is parents and everyone's post on here raises good points.  

Society , particularly the media, are greatly responsible for the state of our culture today.  and while you can limit your kids exposure to a point, this is the reality of our world.   The rhetoric that is hammered into the parents' brains have become accepted as normal without a blink of the eye.  Think about it.  When I was a kid, to hear someone swear or even say 'that sucks' was shocking.  Now it is so pervasive that it is accepted as normal dialect.  s*x was a private subject.  Now it is fodder for sitcoms.  Frequent exposure does faciliate acceptace.

Answer 9

Thinking of today's kids is much ahead of even my time  (80's born) , they have technology , they have lots of facilities , they have money , Genetic mutation is ON  , they think faster, logically more enhanced , but they are also loosing their innocence at an early age , even 11-12 year olds talk about s*x & stuff like that . they are way ahead of the older generation .

Answer 10

It would work. I'm not going to let my children feel as if they are entitled to things that people work so hard for. They have to earn their special things. Christmas and birthdays aren't going to be overloaded unless somebody else buys them things. I will not allow a cell phone unless they can pay for it. I will NOT allow a computer in their private rooms. A TV will be allowed as long as it is not being abused. If they are grounded, I will take it away and lock it up. Toys and gadgets are nice, but if there is no practical use for them, children should not have them unless it is a really special treat.

A child's focus should be on school, friends, and family. Today's kid's parents allow their focus to go more towards toys and gadgets whre children converse about hings we wouldn't have until high school. Texting is the worst thing ever invented and picture phones for teens is also horrid where parental discretion is rarely there. I blame the parent's though. For any number of reasons. Kids havent changed, but parenting methods in the last decade have.