What is emotional incest?

Question

what is emotional incest

Answer 1

Emotional Incest

By Robert Burney M.A.

"Consider a scenario where mother is crying in her bedroom and her three year old toddles into the room. To the child it looks as if mom is dying. The child is terrified and says, "I love you mommy!" Mom looks at her child. Her eyes fill with love, and her face breaks into a smile. She says, 'Oh honey, I love you so much. You are my wonderful little boy/girl. Come here and give mommy a hug. You make mommy feel so good.'  

A touching scene? No. Emotional abuse! The child has just received the message that he/she has the power to save mommy's life. That the child has power over, and therefore responsibility for, mommy's feelings. This is emotional abuse, and sets up an emotionally incestuous relationship in which the child feels responsible for the parent's emotional needs.

A healthy parent would explain to the child that it is all right for mommy to cry, that it is healthy and good for people to cry when they feel sad or hurt. An emotionally healthy parent would "role model" for the child that it is okay to have the full range of emotions, all the feelings - sadness and hurt, anger and fear, Joy and happiness, etc."  

Codependence: The Dance of Wounded Souls by Robert Burney

Answer 2

hahaha

i thought fred o's answer was funny

but uh

when i family memeber takes advantage or give a messege to another in their favor

Answer 3

I guess loving a family member the way you would love a bf, husband but without consumating the relationship physically. And patois, you described an extreme situation there, the kid would feel uncomfortable see her cry like that in the first place and sure is reliefed to hear how he is feeling better of a sudden. And how are family members not responsible for each other feelings, thats why children call home from time to time and shed money on mothers day gifts.

Answer 4

When you love yourself too much?.

Answer 5

Well I would imagine it is when you feel something towards a family member????

Answer 6

cassius, the instances you pointed out (children calling home, spending money on mother's day gifts) are things that ADULT children do. young children do NOT need to be held responsible for making their parents "feel better"