What is it like to live in an ORPHANAGE?

Question

What is it like to live in an ORPHANAGE?

Answer 1

I never lived in an orphanage, but I did live in a government group home.  Girls with bad parents and girls from juvenile hall lived with me.

Overall, I think group homes were a waste of money. It didn't help us re-socialize. They medicated us and put us under 24 hr surveillance.  I was the mildest one, so I didn't take the meds.

The staff is mixed. Some are awful but some really care about you.

It gets depressing often and a few of my friends there ran away.

We went to regular public schools and had allowances.

There was also a therapist there. We saw her 2x per week, 1 for 1-on-1 time, and another for group therapy.

Many of the girls returned to juvenile hall after a short time there.

It wasn't pleasant.

Answer 2

FYI, there are no orphanages in the U.S.  There are group homes and shelters, which are similar.  They are on a smaller scale.  Orphanages were abolished in 1950 due to the rampant neglect of children there.  

But outside the U. S. they are prevalent.  Many are overcrowded, with too many children and too few caregivers.  Just like anything in life, there are good ones and bad ones.  Unfortunately, the bad ones outnumber the good ones.

Some are run by greedy thieves who take what has been donated for the children (food, school supplies, clothing, bedding, etc.) and distribute it to the staff, take it home or sell it.  (I have first hand information on this from my investigation into some orphanages in Vietnam, sponsored by a large U.S. company who discovered these atrocities after their U.S. and British employees would make frequent visits to the orphanage while doing business in Vietnam.)

Many times the children are treated as pawns by the employees.  The smallest and least strong in any society is vulnerable to abuse.  They are too often shuffled around like cattle, given the least amount possible to eat, are always cold or always hot, and are abused by the older children and staff.

At best, the institutionlizing of children prevents their emotional development, retards their social skills, delays  their physical growth, impedes their educational development, encourages medical ailments, and in some cases greatly hinders bonding and attachment.  These children are often seen being paraded in front of adoption personnel or adoptive parents, like they were puppies.  These kids are often seen quickly "attaching" and "bonding" to any adult who comes to the orphanage.  This is a very bad sign (attachment disorder).  If they were able to bond appropriately, they would be leary of strangers and reluctant to go with strangers, like any child!

Now, there are good orphanages, too.  They have more staff, feed the children well, keep them protected and educated, and work with reputable agencies who return a good portion of their adoption fees back ino the orphanages.

When adoptive parents adopt from an orphanage, they need to realize that these children are going to have special needs, just like older children in the harsh U.S. foster care system!  Expecting them to be normal, happy, well adjusted children (even though they may look like it!) is so unfair.  These children need therapy, and expert guidance to adjust normally longterm.  Anything else would be deprivation as well.  Children cannot be expected to escape insitutionalization without scars.

Answer 3

It depends on the orphanage.

I've seen an orphanage (been there personally) where they have house parents and lots of other adults to provide for care.  Each room looks like a normal bedroom only it has three or four beds in it.  They have a boys wing & a girls wing.  They have a room parent staying in the room with them at night.  They get up in the morning and get ready for the day with the RP's help.  They go down to breakfast and get a nutritious meal.  They go to school (on site) where they get a good, solid education that will improve their opportunities in life (they are instructed in English and computers as well as the other core subjects, which will give the children much brighter futures).  They break for lunch & resume their studies.  They have plenty of time for outside activity and imaginative play.  They have chores they need to do.  They play games together, they sing songs, read stories and all the things we all do with our children.  They get plenty of attention and love.  They have their bedtime routine and then they go off to dreamland.  This orphanage has folks who attend the teaching college come in to help at the school and in consideration for the opportunity they're giving the college students, they have a certain number of scholarships for college each year for the kids who graduate from the school and want to go on to get a higher education.  It's an excellent orphanage run by caring people.

I've heard of orphanages that have so many kids in them & the ratio of kids to care givers is quite high.  In these situations, the kids aren't given enough stimulation & some die from failure to thrive.  These kids tend to develop trust issues and have attachment issues without a primary caregiver to bond with.  They may have some educational opportunities, but they're often limited.

That's a best & worst case scenario.  Most orphanages, I think, are somewhere in between.  If you're curious about a specific orphanage, ask parents who've adopted from there (especially if they got a chance to visit the orphanage) or people who've done missionary work in that orphanage.

Answer 4

Hey i'm 17 and just moved out of various foster homes. It really depends on the person and how they can deal with things. Although life can be hard at times it can also be really good and you can meet some of the most amazing people who are really inspiring. That said i'm glad to be out but it's hard. i live by myself and it's hard because i'm still at high school and all my friends live with their parents but it sets you up to be very strong. And that's quite a good thing that comes out of it.

Answer 5

my daughter was at a children's shelter (same thing) before she came to live with us and she said that all of the older girls there would beat up the younger girls and take their stuff, the kids at school would call them horrible names which I'm not going to repeat, the boys felt like they could just come up and touch you wherever they wanted whenever they wanted, there weren't very many workers and they only did the bare minimum of taking care of you, food was horrible,  and out of 500 kids, only 3 older ones (age 10 +) get adopted every year. i've concluded that's it's not a very great place to be.

Answer 6

I'm guessing that it would be a really hard life.

Answer 7

My grandma lived in an Orphanage in China, she said, she peed in her bed every night because she doesn't want to bother the adults, they punish them severely. They get scraps of food after the adults, if she was to asks for seconds, she'll get yelled at

Answer 8

One of my mothers friends lived in one and she said they she always felt alone and then when she would make a friend it always seemed as though they got taken away to be adopted.  As for the babys'she said they do not get any one on one attention everything is on a schedule when to feed them, change diapers and there are usually allot of them so they just spend most of there days in a crib.  She said the older kids it is very uncomfortable because they have people coming in to adopted kids and they all feel like they are being started at an observed in the hopes to get adopted.  So this is not from my experience but someone who told me about it.  Must be a hard life for people.